Saturday 23 December 2017

"so too are the days of our lives..." Dave Sim's Bloggymail #2

Hi, Everybody!

Your ol' Interim Editor Matt Dow here. Today, I thought we'd take a look back at Dave Sim's Blog & Mail. Specifically, the second one. With my then-commentary.


Preamble: Dave Sim's Blog & Mail ran on the Cerebus Yahoo group from September 13th, 2006 to December 26th, 2007. And...no, that's pretty much all you needed to know. I used to call it the "bloggymail" because in Spanish, "and" is "y", and I thought "Blog y Mail" sounded funny, or something. Dude, it was a decade ago. Wait do you want? Anyway,


On 9/14/06, Dave Sim < dsim@nonexistente-mail.net> wrote:
Thursday September 14 – UBER-YAHOO MARGARET "MAGGS" LISS IS IN RECEIPT OF THE LAST BATCH OF CEREBUS NOTEBOOKS AND, IN HER NOCTURNAL AND WEEKEND YAHOO IDENTITY AS CEREBUSFANGIRL (AS OPPOSED TO HER "MAD CHEMICAL ENGINEER" CIVILIAN IDENTITY AT [redacted for super secret identity]) (NOW APPEARING ON YOUR MONITOR WITH THE UBIQUITOUS "SOMEWHERE IN THE COMMONWEALTH OF MASSACHUSSETTS" SUBHEADING), HAS BEGUN OR IS ALMOST DONE SCANNING THEM.

And this is why we like Margaret (I'm not allowed to call her "Maggs").  She does all the hard work.



A good example of how unbelievably efficient is Margaret is that the last batch of notebooks came back with their respective computer disks before Gerhard could get back from vacation and post this first week's worth of BLOG items.   I'm now awaiting word whether she wants to take a break or dive right into scanning the Archive proper starting with all the pre-Cerebus documents.

How much stuff is that?  I may end up owing her TWO cokes.



  SOMEWHERE DOWN THE LINE SHE AND HER TEAM OF CRACK VOLUNTEERS (NO, THEY AREN'T ON CRACK, THEY'RE ALL JUST GOOD AT WHAT THEY DO)

This reminds me of the comic my brother created when we were kids.  The "Butt Crack Commandos".  He never did anything other then make up the title.  I should mention it the next time I see him.


WILL BE PRODUCING A COMMERCIAL PACKAGE ON DVD FOR CONSUMPTION BY…WELL…PRESUMABLY MOSTLY YOU FOLKS, THE DEVOTED CORE CEREBUS READERSHIP

Margaret has teased us with some of the notebooks contents, but are there a lot of "by the wayside" ideas and concepts.  I remember that in "Church & State", there was mention of a lot of background stuff that you didn't have the space to touch on.  Was that all written down, or was that all in your head?
Just wondering.


(OR AS YOU'RE MORE WIDELY AND POPULARLY KNOWN IN COMIC-BOOK STORES AROUND THE ENGLISH-SPEAKING WORLD: "THAT WEIRD GUY/CHICK WHO ACTUALLY LIKES THAT CEREBUS CRAP.")
My local retailer read my copies of the last dozen or so issues of Cerebus (he never ordered extras, and he read them out of my pull file.  Say, what's a guy got to do to get a "Ceribite Kick-Death Assassination Squad" to rough up his local retailer?)


WE WILL KEEP YOU POSTED AS BULLETINS ARE ISSUED FROM THE CEREBUSFANGIRLCAVE. 

I'd ask where that's located, but I'm afraid of the answer.


LATEST WORD AS OF 8 SEPTEMBER IS THAT THE MATERIAL IS ALL SCANNED AND NOW JUST NEEDS TO BE TWEAKED AND NEATENED UP A BIT. 

Yup.  And she's looking for volunteers to help.  And if I had ANY computer skills, I would.


ANYONE WHO HAS BEEN TO THE www.cerebusfangirl.com WEBSITE KNOWS THAT MAGGS NEVER DOES ANYTHING SLOPPILY. 

*offensive joke deleted*


     SAY DOES THIS ALL-CAPS FORMAT LOOK LIKE I'M YELLING AT YOU

No, but you do yell at me in my dreams.  It's weird.  On a half dozen occasions you've shown up in a dream and yelled at me.  In the second or third one, my mom was getting led to some sort of death camp, and you were trying to warn me that she was in fact being led to some sort of death camp.  And playing "Pole Position".  Yelling at me and playing video games.
Weird.
Of course, my mom is fine (she says "Hi.") ((Ok, not really.)) (((but if she knew I was writing this, she'd probably say "hi.")))


OR DOES IT JUST GIVE EVERYTHING A NICE "THIS CALLS FOR AN EMERGENCY!" QUALITY?

Sorta...


COME TO THINK OF IT NEVER MIND EITHER ONE IS FINE WITH ME!

...then nevermind.


    We'll be right back after this short commercial message:

Ok.



Today's Blog & Mail is brought to you by All 16 Cerebus Trade Paperbacks!

Neat!


Remember! With Halloween coming up that Cerebus trade paperbacks make an ideal "treat" for your neighbourhood "trick-or-treaters".  
Yeah, they'll rip the bottom out of the bag, and you can get all the candy.  Sweet idea Dave!


Through until October 31st we'll be offering four dozen copies of Cerebus, High Society or Jaka's Story for only $2,000 US. Get 48 of one title or make your own Party Pack mixing all three! Watch their faces light up when you answer the doorbell with…Cerebus Trade paperbacks!

Wait a minute.  2000 divided by 48 equals...$41.67!?!  Is that $2000 with shipping included, or extra?


Cerebus Trade Paperbacks! Any pins or razor blades just drop right out when you fan the pages! That's why choosy Moms who REALLY LOVE ALL CHILDREN EVERYWHERE are choosing Cerebus Trade Paperbacks This Halloween!

Plus, if some Micheal Jackson type tries to seduce your kid with "Jesus juice", said kid can just hurl the Cerebus Trade Paperback at his freaky deformed nose. 
Cerebus Trade Paperbacks: Like Mace, but with prettier pictures.


When ordering from www.followingcerebus.com be sure to
Mention that you read about this Special Halloween Offer
 at the Blog & Mail because we
Haven't told Craig a thing about it!

This is gonna be interesting.




TONIGHT IS THE DOUG WRIGHT AWARDS IN TORONTO.  THE LEAD-IN EVENT IS SETH INTERVIEWING CHESTER BROWN AND I'M HOPING TO GET SOME PHOTOS AND MAYBE EVEN SOME FOOTAGE OF BOTH EVENTS.   I'M ALSO GOING WITH JOHN AND SIU TO A FILM AT THE TORONTO INTERNATIONAL FILM FESTIVAL THIS MORNING, MOSTLY JUST FOR THE EXPERIENCE OF ACTUALLY WATCHING A MOVIE ON A WEEKDAY MORNING.     

How was the movie?





PLUG!  ACADEMY X (ACX) VOLUMES 1 AND 2 WRITTEN BY ADAM CADRE AND DRAWN BY ROB WHEELER. ROB SENT ME A PRINT-OUT OF THIS ON-LINE STRIP (260 PAGE SO FAR) AND IT'S REALLY QUITE GOOD.   JIM SHOOTER GOT HIS START AT AGE 13 (YOU READ THAT RIGHT) DRAWING SUPERMAN AND LEGION OF SUPER-HEROES STORIES ON NOTEPAPER AND SENDING THEM TO MORT WEISINGER AT DC WHO SAW THAT THE STORIES WERE "ALL THERE" AND JUST NEEDED TO BE SENT TO ARTISTS LIKE JOHN FORTE AND CURT SWAN AS BLUEPRINTS.   ACADEMY X IS SORT OF A STEP UP FROM THAT IN THAT ROB JUST NEEDS TO DEVELOP AN INK FINISH TO MATCH HIS LAYOUT AND COMPOSITION SKILLS AND THEN WATCH OUT, WORLD! AND ADAM CADRE'S STRAIGHT-AHEAD SCRIPT MAKES YOU LONG FOR THE DAYS WHEN THE X-MEN WAS, YOU KNOW, COHERENT.  SIX ON-LINE ISSUES SO FAR.  I SENT ROB A LETTER AUGUST 30 TO HAVE HIM POST DETAILS HERE SO HOPEFULLY HE SHOULD BE TURNING UP ANY MINUTE NOW.  AT LEAST THREE LAUGH-OUT LOUD LINES AND HEAVY ON THE "AND THEN WHAT HAPPENED?"

I'm pretty sure Rob did indeed show up.  Haven't had a change to look at his webbysite yet.


___________________________________________________
previous posts:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/cerebus/message/95679
___________________________________________________
This may also be viewed at http://davesim.blogspot.com/


Jeff made you an actual blog.  Wasn't that nice.  Say, speaking of this; did you want Jeff to allow comments on the blog?  The actual blog, not the Yahoo postings (we'll comment if we damn well want to around here!  "You'll get our keyboards when you pry them from our weak girly-like fingers.  Probably while we weep.")  You should let Jeff know.
___________________________________________________________________________________________

And that's #2, there was a picture in there of...something, but it's been lost forever...or, at least I don't know where it is.

Next time: the next one!

9 comments:

Travis Pelkie said...

"There are more fonts in heaven and Earth, Matt Dow, / Than are dreamt of in your philosophy"

Still no word from Seiler on my sammich, neither.

Tony Dunlop said...

OK, yeah, fine...but how come no word yet on whether Cerebus appears in "Blade Runner 2049?" Hanh? HANH???

Jeff said...

Travis, I'm in Arkansas for Christmas (soo-pig country), so I could bring back a pork belly sammich for you, if you want.

Anonymous said...

The only thing that could make this more unreadable would be comic sans and webdings.

Damian T. Lloyd, Esq. said...

Tony D.: I blame the Marxist / feminist / homosexualist conspiracy.

-- Damian

Mouse Skull Entertainment said...

Travis: Sammiches ain't my problem, talk to Shecky...

Tony: I've been too busy going frame by frame through Alien: Covenant. No aardvarks yet, but I'm only twelve minutes in...

Shecky (Jeff): For the love of Tarim just GET HIM A SAMMICH ALREADY!!!

Anonymous: Unreadable how? More specific comments will result in better articles (maybe... it could happen... shut up.)

Damian: As my t-shirt says: "My Marxist-Feminist Dialectic brings all the boys to the yard"

Travis Pelkie said...

Mmm, pork belly...

Anonymous said...

@ Matt "Unreadable how?"

I'm curious as to what you think IS readable about your blog entry.

Now I appreciate that some of the problem comes from the source material. However, you have made the choice to present it, bad formatting and all, for people to read. And in fact, you have made it worse, by interspersing your own commentary throughout -- which also has formatting problems. By analogy, you have taken a dump on a shit sandwich.

If someone were to need an example, for instructional purposes, of how not to format text, they could find no better example than what you have posted.

The post looks like a ransom note. It looks like something a serial killer would compose -- on an off day. It looks like something a child would post. While having a seizure. It looks like a circus poster. For a circus that was surely closed down for abuse of animals.

It is as if the post was edited by someone actively attempting to sabotage any semblance of readability. The formatting only makes sense if there were some secret information in the text that needed to be protected forever.

If you see anything in the posting but a grotesquery, I can only assume that you have some inherent deficiency that prevents you from feeling human suffering.

In short, words cannot adequately describe the awfulness of the text formatting of this blog post.

I think it would be an insult to actually list the formatting problems in the post, but they are numerous, and should be well understood by anyone who has even a passing knowledge of how to format text.

Again, I appreciate that part of the problem is the source material. But that's no excuse. You thought it was a good idea to present it, as is, and make it worse. With all due respect, perhaps not the best thought out plan.



Tony one more time said...

Hey, what say we all set up a Gofundme account to buy Mr. Anonymous a sense of humor?