Monday, 23 June 2025

Please Hold For Dave Sim 11/2020: the Transcript!

Hi, Everybody!

Mondays!

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Jesse Lee Herndon has caught up to Dave and I on the Please Hold Transcripts, And since I'm out of Proto-Strange Death of Alex Raymond pages, I may as well start knocking out these transcripts.
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Please Hold For Dave Sim 11/2020:

Dave: Hello, Matt! How are you doing?

Matt: I’m here. [laughs]

Dave: [laughs] Interimly.

Matt: It’s been one of them long months, this week, again.

Dave: I hear ya, I hear ya.

Matt: I’m not even talking about the outside world, I’m just talking about going to work, coming home, and doing stuff.

Dave: Yeah! Yeah, why is the real basics getting so difficult?

Matt: Because it’s 2020, in 2022 we’ll all be fine.

Dave: Yeah, it’s a theory. [laughs] I’m not one of those people who’s looking ahead expecting this to get any better, but I certainly admire the optimism of the people who think we’re gonna get back to normal at some point.

Matt: We’ll be AB normal.

Dave: That’s it. That’s it. I gotta try calling you back, because you’re getting really warbley on this end.

Matt: Uhh, lemme try something else…

Dave: Okay.

Matt: Am I better now? Or is it still warbley?

[silence]

Matt: Hello?

[more silence]

Matt: Huh. You still there, Dave?

[yet more silence]

Matt: Cause I’m no hearing anything.

[son of silence]

Matt: Hello?

Dave: Hello?

Matt: Ahh! I accidentally hi the mute button, can you hear me now? [laughs]

Dave: [laughs] Yep, it’s a little, sounds like squirrels scampering up and down the line, but I can work around that.

Matt: Okay, I can hear you fine, so.

Dave: Okay, that’s the important thing, I guess. Okay, we’ve got some clean-up from last month. This is a fax, October 3rd, from David Birdsong, “Cerebus in Hell?” team member in good standing. “I had a different question for this month’s ‘Please Hold for Dave Sim’, but thought it might be too big an answer, but if you want to answer it next month. So, what is for children, and what if is for fools. So the saying goes. But as comic book people, I feel like we get a bit of a mulligan. It’s Stan Lee’s fault, or whoever came up with Marvel’s ‘What If?’. You have spoken and written a bit about how you began reading the Bible as research for the latter part of Cerebus. We know how that turned out. But here it comes, what if you had not had the experience reading scripture as you did? What might the end of Cerebus been like? I won’t ask you to speculate on your personal life, it’s probably not hard to figure out, but that kind of what if is pretty meaningless. You can’t go back and change it now, so why waste time wondering about it. If only, if only, if only, is a good way to get stuck in the past. But it does seem like you did have a different plan in mind for Cerebus.” And thank you, David, I would answer that… an elaborate question, by saying, I think that misunderstands the extent to which predestination figured into Cerebus. That I’m not sure… we assume on a conventional basis that Dave Sim came up with the idea for Cerebus and Dave Sim came up with the idea for 300 issues of Cerebus, but I don’t know that… the misses the point that God, the appeal of Cerebus and the appeal of Dave Sim coming up with Cerebus, or whoever came up with Cerebus and implanted it in Dave Sim, the appeal was that this was the first time, as far as I know in history, where a writer said, “I’m going to tell a 26 year story. It starts here, and it goes for 26 years, and then it stops.” And the appeal of that was, I think, the same kind of Book of Job wager between God and his adversary was, how do you picture… [glitch] and for the adversary who doesn’t exist entirely in fourth dimensional space but I think exists sort of incrementally in fourth dimensional space, was like, “uh, what is this? A trick question? This guy’s gonna be a mess. Here it is 1977 and he’s already pretty well addicted to drugs, and he drinks a fair bit, and started committed adultery before he was married, and while he was married, and basically really doesn’t think of anything in terms of conventional good and evil. So I bet on this guy ending up well on my team at the end of the 26 years. Whereas, I think, God knew, being omniscient, this is how this is going to go. That me coming up with a 6000 page graphic novel, and then starting with the barbarian stories and then going onto political storyline, and then going to an organized religion storyline “Church & State”, etc etc. And doing literary treatments of Oscar Wilde, and then F Scott Fitzgerald and then Ernest Hemingway, the natural step at the end of that will be, okay, then he’s going to have to take on the Bible. Which he ended up doing, and for God it was just a slam dunk. “If he goes in the natural sequence that he has to go in, and it’s predestined that he’ll end up on my team. As unlikely a candidate for devout monotheism as this guy looks like in 1977, that’s exactly how perfect a candidate for monotheism and being a servant of God as he’s going to turn out being.” So, the answer is, it was predestined that it was going to go that way, so it was really out of my hands, even though it was completely in my hands. I built the structure so that I had complete autonomy, nobody was going to interfere with what it was that I had to say. And that could only end one way. Man is basically good and will aspire to be good and improve if he’s given autonomy. It’s usually, people choose evil because they’ve got external influences that they’re prey to. They made a choice, and now this entity is in control of them, whether it’s a boss at work or a Fortune 500 company, or dictatorial parents, or doctrinaire organized religion. That’s where evil comes from, autonomy and complete freedom of choice. God’s point is, everybody ends up being good in that context. We’ve just got too much of the adversary dicking around with people on the edges and then saying, “look, look, this person is evil.” Well, no, they weren’t evil until you started dicking around with them like that. So, there you go, David Birdsong! That’s my best answer to that one. So the other one leftover from last time, and I just got to grab my… “Bartlett’s Book of Familiar Quotations” and we were talking last time about Robert Graves and “The White Goddess” and I just happened to run across Robert Graves’ relatively short section in Bartlett’s famous quotations, and it’s a quote from “The White Goddess”, 1948. “The reason why the hairs stand on end, the eyes water, the throat is constricted, the skin crawls and a shiver runs down the spine when one writes or reads a true poem is that a true poem is necessarily an invocation of the White Goddess, or Muse, the Mother of All Living, the ancient power of fright or lust—the female spider or the queen bee whose embrace is death.” [laughs] And it’s like, I read that and I go, well wait a minute, the Mother of All Living is a biblical reference. That’s what the meaning was of Eve’s original name, Chavah, means “the mother of all living”, and to me that’s just the adversary. There’s no such thing as a White Goddess or Muse or Mother of All Living. I think Graves is on the wrong track there, and he’s on the right track when he talks about the female spider or the queen bee whose embrace is death, which, to me, is YHWH, God’s adversary. So there you go, [laughs] now we’re all done with last month’s, now we can start with this month’s. Brian West asks: “Questions for Dave: How's Cerebus Campaign 2020 going? Have all the results for the "RED STATE," "BLUE STATE," and "I VOTE FOR CEREBUS" editions of HIGH SOCIETY been tabulated yet? If not, which edition is in the lead so far?” [laughs] And you added to that, “Good man Brian. We should give him a raise…”

Matt: [laughs]

Dave: Or pay him! Either one would be fine. That was all settled, Diamond decided, because of the complications of it, that the “High Society” Red State, Blue State, and I Vote for Cerebus campaign was just going to be a single straw poll, a one and done. So those orders all came in, I believe in May? May or April. [sneezes] And as it turned out, Red State won by, I believe by two or three copies, over Blue State, but I Vote for Cerebus beat both of their asses all hollow. I think it was about a two to one ratio of I Vote for Cerebus over Red State and like I say, Red State beat Blue State. So, I’m taking it under advisement. I might go to court and say, look, according to this straw poll in May, Cerebus is the new President of the United States. And for the moment, legally, I will leave it at that.

Matt: [laughs]

Dave: That okay by you?

Matt: That’s fine. Speaking of voting, I got an email from Eddie, the current Spawn 10 vote for the Halloween Edition is, yes 18, no 1, abstain 3, and not voted so far 6.

Dave: Yes! Yes, I was wondering whether I was going to mention that, so thank you [glich; sneezes].

Matt: Well, I responded to him, going, did people change their vote or is the Russian election interference I heard so much about? [laughs]

Dave: [laughs] It’s very difficult to hack Dave Sim because he doesn’t have internet access. Not impossible, I’m sure they could stick a bunch of stuff in my laptop of they wanted to. That was people changing their votes because what I suggested was, instead of just diluting the pool, which was 54 signed and numbered copies, what we would do is add artist’s proofs. If you ordered on October 31st, then you get a numbered copy between 4 and 54, signed, and it will say on the comic book itself, on the back cover, “limited to 54 signed and [glitch]” and X number of artist’s proofs. AP’s, which will be unnumbered. But on those comics, they will be signed and I will write AP next to my name, and to the people who ordered the Halloween Edition on October 31st will get a free artist’s proof in addition to their numbered copy. So, for most of the people, that was persuasive, but I would say, most of the votes were, look, the idea is to try and make some money for Aardvark-Vanaheim, so let’s stick with that. You’re still diluting the rareness of what I’m getting, but, ya know, this is an equitable solution, it means the people who absolutely weren’t aware or weren’t notified of the October 31st edition will be able to get a November 10th artist’s proof. And the way I look at it is, it’s the same comic book because, it would be the same as a portfolio. If a portfolio has 54 signed and numbered copies, and then 25 or 50 or 100 artist’s proofs, if it says that in the portfolio, it’s still the same portfolio. I mean, nobody would be the kind of completeist who goes, “I have to own all of the signed and numbered copies, and I have to order all of the artist’s proofs.” If you want be that kind of a completeist, that’s insane.

Matt: [laughs]

Dave: So, if you’ve got an artist’s proof, you’ve got the comic book in question.

Matt: It’s one of those, I suggested one comic with both covers and you just put whichever comic on the outside depending on who paid for it, because how many people need how many additional copies of the Violator wearing a billion dollar dress? I mean, you’re getting the same comic 17 times.

Dave: Right, right. Which is just one of those, this obviously makes sense to people in 2020 in the way that it doesn’t do baby boomers like myself and sub-boomers or whatever you are in your weight class. But we’re all playing along! We’re going, “uh, jeeze, this is just like being 22 years old all over again.” My concern with your solution was, if somebody is getting the book slabbed, you wouldn’t be able to see the interior cover [glitch]. With this one, because it’ll be on the back cover specifying this is how many APs there are, so if you’ve got one it says AP on the front, this is how rare it is, and if you’ve got one that’s got a number on the front, this is how rare that is. So, it’s one of those unfortunate situations, but as I explained to one of the Spawn fans, Steven G, who I think has even posted to AMoC, I said, you can go on there and beg people who have the..

Matt: Uhh, on Tuesday’s post, I was doing the rigmarole of… everyday I put the same links, like the link to the Kickstarter, some of the Spawn’s stuff’s come up on Heritage so I’ve got a link to that, I got the link to the Previews webpages for the newest issues of “Cerebus in Hell?” and there’s like 12 links, I repeat them everytime and people miss stuff. Okay, if you’re only going to read one post, maybe you’ll catch up on whatever it is you’re missing.

Dave: You’re a good planner.

Matt: Well, sometimes it’s at the beginning, sometimes it’s at the end, but I always call it the rigmarole, because it’s, yes, you’ve probably read this a hundred times if you’ve been following along. But for the one guy that it’s your first day… when I did the post, I was putting stuff up and I was putting all the Heritage Spawn art and the four original pages from Cerebus that are up, currently. And when I went to the Spawn stuff, I interrupted it with Steven’s comment and I put what he posted, and it was all in italics, and at the bottom it said, “I’m Steven G and I approve this message” and the next line is me going, “what the hell was that?

Dave: [laughs] Yeah, as I said in my fax to Steven, we sort of went back and forth on this, is that, look if you I wanted to be really provocative about this, I could print four Halloween Edition red covers. That were like solid red, three for the Cerebus Archive, and one I would put up for auction. [laughs] And he goes, “oh no, please, don’t do that, because I’d have to get that one!” It’s like, well okay, let’s try and meet each other halfway on this.

Matt: I’ve come to the realization that it’s a Todd thing, because, “Spider-Man” #1 when it first got released, I think, had four covers, four or five. There was the regular cover, the platinum cover, and then I forget what the other two are. I own the platinum and the regular, because as a kid I’m like, “ah this is neat”, and I’m like, “oh, there’s another one”. Like a year or two later, I found a five pack of the first five issues, and it was a collector’s pack and the cover is gold ink instead of platinum ink, but it’s just like the platinum cover. And it turns out, it’s a second print and was only available in limited quantities, yadda yah, and that apparently is the one that’s worth money because it’s so rare, and I’m like, it’s a Todd thing. The rarer it is and it involves Todd, the more people want it.

Dave: Right, right. Steven was telling me that actually he’s more of an expert on Spawn than Todd is! They ended up turning over the Todd McFarlane book to him to put together because he had more stuff and he knew more about the stuff than the people at Todd McFarlane Productions did! And it’s like I’m going, I think this is a syndrome in comics. The same as Matt Dow and Margaret Liss are the custodians of my brain cells. The same sort of thing with Todd, “Did I do dat? Dat sounds like a really good idea. I’m glad I came up with dat, I don’t want remember nuffin’ about dat. So I think I was lookin‘ at my hockey cards dat year.”

Matt: [laughs]

Dave: Okay, back to the questions, Steve asks, “And my Please Hold questions: 1) Why was the cover to Swords vol #1 changed from the first to second printing? (...I may have already asked this and forgotten Dave's answer...)” Yeah, we’re all getting to that age. “(...and as a former pressman, I have to say: knockout text like what's on the back cover is an absolute BITCH to print on a one or two color press!!...)” Boy, tell me about it. That’s one of those, I know exactly what I want this to look like, but no, you need a much bigger press and a much bigger print run to be able to do that kind of knockout type. It was changed because I didn’t like the cover. I knew what I wanted the cover to “Swords” Vol 1 to look like, a cross between Bernie Wrightson’s “Bad Time Stories” cover, with the watercolor quality to it, and the first or second “Flash Annual”, which had close-up pictures of Flash at the bottom of these vertical columns, and each column was a different story. And boy, the way it looked in my head was really really good, and the way it actually came out was as a piece of artwork was, ehh, really really only a fraction of that. And then as usually happens with something that I’m not happy with, with the drawing or the painting when I get it done, the printing did it no favors. The printing on the “Swords” Vol 1 cover was really, really bad. And it was like, no, this was gonna be my Dave Sim “Bad Time Stories”, a $5 square bound, relatively thin book, but something where I was just absolutely jazzed by how the colour came out and how I put the whole cover together. So it was, forget it, let’s rethink that right from the ground up. “2) Were any changes made to the art / dialogue / etc when going from the original 'floppies’” God, I hate that word. [laughs] I really hate ‘floppies’. Anyway. “to the initial phone book printings?” Not that I’m aware of. I think… Cerebus “High Society” when Cerebus is changing into his suit for the first time, and the lead in to the page has a conversation from outside. He goes into the room and closes the door on the conversation that Astoria is having with somebody. And the way I emphasized that was having part of the bottom of the word balloon cut off, so that the words were amputated on the bottom line horizontally. And somebody at Preney went, “oh jeez, Dave made a mistake here and the letters are missing here. Let’s put the letters back in.”

Matt: [laughs]

Dave: [laughs] So for the longest time, that really really good page, I mean that’s right up in the record setting category for Cerebus original artwork. Somebody at Preney tried to just fix my lettering, and that was one of those, ahh, I can’t even be really bothered to fixing this. I don’t think it was until one of the later trade paperbacks that I went, “okay, okay. Time to fix this. The age of the Preney Print & Litho dicked around with world balloon, I am declaring officially at the end.” I think that’s about the only thing I can think of, in that category. “3) What issues during the original 300 run had a second printing, and were all those issues so designated on the front cover?” [makes buzzer sound] Time’s up! I have no idea. No, actually, it’s… issues 151, 152, 153… 154 possibly, that’s when my memory gets kinda fuzzy about it and yes, all of those on the cover where the number is, where it would say “151 Oct”, it says “151 2nd Printing”. So, if you’re a Cerebus completeist, you can’t just have an issue 151, you’ve gotta have a 151 and a 151 second printing. “4) Why the investment in Canadian price variant comics (multiple copies, at that), titles like Ms. Tree, and whatever else? Is this an investment you think could later be sold to help finance the Archive? Simply want some clarity on your thinking.” Says Steve. Both, actually, and for different reasons. “Ms. Tree” I didn’t have any of the Aardvark-Vanaheim issues of “Ms. Tree” and the fact that Wilf Jenkins collection had them, I thought, well okay, there’s a situation where I’m probably overpaying buying these for $10 Canadian, but this is a chance for me to complete the Aardvark-Vanaheim collection of stuff that we actually published. This many years later on, it’s kind of one of those things that I want to do. The Canadian Price Variants, that’s definitely building insulation around the archive. I do have a pecking order of, if I get to the point where I have to start selling artwork, just to be paying bills. Which, I was getting to that point, but now it looks like I’m not at that point. It’s, what can I purchase that I think is going to go up in value exponentially, and that will become the canary in the mine shaft, where if I go, “okay something’s happened to the worldwide economy. Something’s happened to Canada’s economy. Something’s happened to me personally and I need to turn stuff into money, I think that a Canadian Price Variant of Spider-Man 252 is pick to click for that kind of exponential growth in value. Just because they were newsstand copies. The number of them that are in great condition is very very low, the number that didn’t get the covers stripped off is very very low, and it’s a key Marvel book, so a Spider-Man completeist 20 years from is definitely going to want to have one of those and will be paying a premium price because of the CGC census, we know how many there are. We know how many have been slabbed, and compared to the number of newsstand copies of 252 and the number of direct market copies of 252, it’s a minuscule quantity. Bob Overstreet is very very cautious guy about this stuff, and has been very very slow to acknowledge the rarity of the Canadian Price Variant. So that’s why Dave got, this is my one chance to buy Apple stock. This brand new Apple stock that’s going for $8 or $9 and I know this is going to go up to Apple style levels, so let me buy these right now. The one that I’m working on right now, talking to Doug Sulipa, is the Archie “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles” #1, which I think is in the same category as Spider-Man 252, but on steroids because it’s the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, which is definitely competitive with Spider-Man in terms of general public awareness. And most people didn’t see the Mirage Turtles. Like the Mirage Turtles sold really really well for the direct market, but it really wasn’t until Archie did a licensed Turtles comic book that it got up into, by comparison, astronomical numbers. And again, a minuscule percentage of those are Canadian Price Variants. And I don’t think Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is ever going to go out of popularity, particularly for the generation that was 8 or 9 years old in the 1980s, 1990s. So that’s what’s where I’m probably going to be doing my purchasing with Doug Sulipa. We’ve actually worked out, I think, a deal where instead of taking $100 Canadian off of the Aardvark-Vanaheim company Visa every month, which I authorized him to do, now I’m going to be trading him “Cerebus in Hell?” #1s as they come out. He will be getting “Cerebus in Hell?” whatever the latest #1 is, #51 through 75, and we will be trading dollar for dollar. So I will be getting $100 US in trade from him, and he’ll be getting numbered copies 51 through 75, unsigned. Because, as we’ve already found out just in the last couple of days, if you don’t have it authenticated as a signature series, it gets a purple label. It’s just writing on the cover. And we don’t know who wrote on it, but that brings the value down.

Matt: I gotta look into that, because the shop that I buy comics from does do signings and when they do the signings they do do CGC witnessing, and I gotta talk to the owner about, okay, how does that work if we witness it and I don’t send it to get slabbed, is the witnessing still valid? Like if I have the paperwork saying it was witnessed, could I then sell it to somebody who then gets it slabbed? Because if that’s the case, then you could always set it up so that you’re doing a signing with someone who can do witnessing so that, you know, here’s 30 copies of a book, they’re not slabbed, but they have the paperwork so that you could get them slabbed.

Dave: Right. Right. And what did he say?

Matt: I haven’t asked him yet, it’s on my to-do list.

Dave: Okay, alright.

Matt: But as soon as I find out, I’m gonna fax somebody in Canada! [laughs]

Dave: [laughs] Okay, well I will be breathlessly awaiting that.

Matt: Speaking of breathlessly awaiting, Hobbs sent me the 10 copies of the virgin “Batvark: Penis” and when I found out you only got three copies for the archive and that’s it, I already decided that two of them are getting away to the box of stuff that I have to send Dave, so that you’ll have two copies you can either trade or sell.

Dave: Great! Thank you.

Matt: It’s one of those, yeah I can auction them off and get between $25 and $500 depending on what the market is that day, but it’s like, if I send it to Dave, you can get it slabbed! [laughs]

Dave: Yes! Yes. One of the things I would like to get sorted out, and I have been meaning to get in touch with Paul Litch, who’s a longtime guy at CGC and I used to see him at conventions and stuff like that. And say to him, is there some way that CGC can come up with a thing where I can vouch for myself? Like I can say, I’m Dave Sim, and yes, I actually signed this. Because, I really don’t have a vested interest in saying that I signed something that I didn’t actually sign, and it’s one of the reasons why I did the Wilf Jenkins collection the way that I did it. If you have a colour photograph of the comic book with the signatures on it, that’s very difficult to fake in any way. Is there some way I can do that and the authenticity photograph would get included in the slabbing that CGC would put it in the back over the back cover? But, with this COVID-19 thing having absolutely devastated the worldwide economy, in particular the American economy, CGC is up to their eyeballs in comic books getting slabbed, because everybody’s doing the, “okay, this is the most valuable thing that I own. Or the 10 most valuable things that I own. I gotta get ‘em slabbed.” Everybody is sending them to CGC simultaneously, and at the same time, the CGC, I don’t know how big their facility is in Florida, is having to do social distancing, so they can’t have everybody doing the slabbing and grading that close together. So I can’t even imagine what their backlog is, and me wanting to vouch for myself, I think would be very very low on Paul Litch’s priority list right now. “Dave, you’re the only cartoonist who would be interested in doing that, and there’s no real money in your stuff compared to all this other stuff that we’re doing. Please, just go away.”

Matt: [laughs]

Dave: Michael R of Easton, Pennsylvania. It wouldn’t be “Please Hold for Dave Sim” without a, “Michael R of Easton, Pennsylvania asked on Saturday (I don't know if he sent it through Birdsong after I went to bed)”. Yes he did. “Hi Dave! OK, I'm all caught reading all your posts as of 7:58PM. Unless I get REAL crazy tonight. I might. It is a full moon tonight. I may go for 2 copies. Having the #5 copy is enticing,” That’s how quick Michael R was to order the Halloween Edition that he got #5. “But having #26”, which is what Michael R has of everything else, which is one of those, I knew that was going to happen. Michael R would be tempted to buy two copies for that. “will be TREMENDOUS. 5 is the month I was born.” Most of us call that May, but Michael R was born in 5. “So having 5 and 26 (the day I was born) is REALLY enticing. I can't get too greedy, who knows what you and Dagon have planned for the end of this Kickstarter? AAAARGH!!! LOL!!! One ... more ... question. Was Gerhard ever considered inking and backgrounds Spawn 10?" I did answer that, and said, 1993, actually late 1992, [coughs] Excuse me. That was still in the aftershock area of Gerhard and I going to Hawaii and doing five issues in three months, as the perfect form of aversion therapy. Don’t ever, ever get off schedule again. Yes, it’s nice to do this in Hawaii, no you never never want to draw five issues of Cerebus in three months again. So, when the offer from Todd came up to do Spawn 10, it was, I’ll do a script, but I’m not drawing Cerebus that way I did in “Turtles” #8 and I’m not lettering Cerebus the way I did in “Turtles” #8. I think if I sit down and apply myself, I can do a script in two or three days. I know exactly what I want to do. I have a pretty good idea of what an Image comic reads like. I think I can put those two together. And that turned out to be the case, so that’s definitely a record for me in terms of earnings, that even beats your $27 an hour and $33 an hour on Sunday record all hollow because I got somewhere around $92,000 for two days work.

Matt: [laughs]

Dave: Mind you, I’ve never had that kind of work again…

Matt: And you never had that kind of money, cause you gave it to charity! [laughs]

Dave: [laughs] That’s right. That’s right. But it looks really good on the resume, as they say. And yes, Jeff Seiler, I know that it’s résumé , I was just pronouncing it funny. I like to call it a resume. And speaking of Jeff Seiler (nice segue, Dave), Jeff [sneezes], “Question Of The Month From Jeff For Dave: I never noticed it before, but when Cerebus returns to his Regency Hotel suite, in HS, after battling with the Moon Roach and he's doing his diatribe about the Bug, the Elf (Fake Elf?) is wearing his medallions. Is this, as I think, another example of how Cerebus ceded his control to a female, and was him allowing Elf to wear his medallions related to Cerebus' inability to rein in the Bug?” Uhh, yes. Actually, on both of those questions, and it was also a 90s kind of thing… or a 1980s sort of thing that I was commenting on, that I didn’t know at the time if it was a 1980s thing, or this is a general truism about human beings, that girls like to wear guy’s stuff and guys are not so big on wearing girl’s stuff. I don’t know too many guys who go, “I’m gonna go take a look in the wife’s closet. We’re about the same size. See if she’s got any nice little frock that I can wear out tonight.” But, on the other hand, women do like men’s shirts, women do like men’s stuff. Which is one of the reasons that one of things I had Roly email to you today, scan and email to you today, because I just happened to see the photograph and thought of it when I was thinking about Jeff’s question. It’s a picture of Judith Bradford and her friend Shannon in the lobby of the Atlanta Merriott in the 1980s, and Judith is wearing my Rod Stewart jacket. [laughs] And it’s like, that did happen with, I wouldn’t say terrific frequency, but often enough that it’s like, what is up with that? It’s like, yes, you’re an astonishingly pretty young lady, in her teens, and everything looks good on you. And yes, you do look better in my Rod Stewart jacket than I do. But no, you can’t have it. It’s my Rod Stewart jacket! [laughs] I really had to fight to get that one back. I think, that’s one of those things that we can maybe open up for discussion. Was that a 1980s thing, and was that at least partly my fault for buying more androgynous clothing? Like, it’s not a regular guy’s sport jacket, it’s a Rod Stewart jacket, which, I don’t even know what they actually called them, but we all called them Rod Stewart jackets, they were sort of like waist length, looked like regular sport jackets but cut off at the waist and Rod Stewart popularized them. So it’s like, no, guys, wear guys clothing. Wear a sports jacket, wear a shirt, wear a t-shirt, wear jeans, wear dress pants, wear a tuxedo if you want, but don’t wear things that a girl’s gonna go, “that would look really good on me.” So… go ahead, go ahead.

Matt: I was gonna say, what you’re describing that men don’t do, they did in the mid-70s [laughs].

Dave: Right. Right. It’s like, if you go over into that really sloppy gray area, don’t be complaining if your society is going all sloppy and gray. Don’t do that. Stay over on your guy’s side of the fence, and have the girls stay over on their side of the fence. She’s still going to wear your shirts, and wear your t-shirts, and find things that would look really good on her, and are masculine because masculine is good because it’s just another kind of dress-up for women. But, yes, Jeff, that’s definitely what I was making reference to, that I couldn’t picture Cerebus going, “does the Regency Elf have any of these little dress jobs hanging out that she’s not using? Maybe I could wear one of them.” But, if she finds his medallions lying around, “gee, what would Cerebus’ medallions look like on me?” is pretty much a slam dunk. Jeff goes on to say, “Also, when is the Regency Edition of High Society going to be offered for sale? I call dibs on copy #301.” Well, we’ve got a problem right there, because there’s only 150 of them. If we work something out, if you actually get one of them, I will be happy to give you a tipped in plate or something that says, “ignore the number on this copy of ‘High Society: Regency Edition’, it’s not that number, it’s actually #301 and it’s #301 because Jeff Seiler owns it. And if Jeff Seiler owns it, that makes it #301.” Right now, Dagon and I are still talking about it, but my take on it is right now he’s got a waiting list of, well we haven’t talked about it in a few weeks, but the last time that we talked about it, I think there was 240 people that wanted 150 “High Society: Regency Editions”, and it’s like, there’s not too many ways that you can handle that, that everybody’s gonna end up liking Dave Sim out of this. And I’m starting to develop the instinct to, let’s avoid these. Like the “National Lampoon” cover that had Uncle Sam and Tommy the Tooth on the prow of a ship, pointing towards foreign entanglement and tooth decay, and going, “let’s avoid these.”

Matt: I was gonna say, there’s 240 people that want 150 copies, I vaguely remember the Judge on the Moon describing what happens to Cerebus.

Dave: Yes, yeah.

Matt: When Suenteus Po took his army and showed him all the suits of armor and there wasn’t enough armor. The guys figured out what to do.

Dave: [laughs] Right! You take my point. So, trying to figure out how to keep this from blowing up in Dave Sim’s face again, Dave Sim is saying, why don’t we auction the “High Society: Regency Editions”, there’s 150 of them, we’ll start with #150 and we’ll auction one of them a week for three years. Which means, everybody’s gonna get really used to whatever is going to happen, because they’ll be able to see it in real time every week for three years. It’s like, okay, if you want one of them, here’s what #150 went for. You have to come up with your own strategy on them, of going, “I think the price will come down on these. Like a year from now, people are not going to be paying attention to these auctions, and instead of going for this much money, it’s gonna go for half that, or for a quarter that”. Okay, I can certainly understand that theory, and I wouldn’t be surprised to see that happen, but at the same time, if it’s down to the last 70, and the last 60, and then the last 50, and that hasn’t happened yet, when do you go, “okay, I’m just gonna have to spend way too much money on a ‘High Society: Regency Edition’ hardcover, because there’s fewer and fewer of these, and if it looked like the price was stabilizing, it’s now going back to hockey stick territory. And I’ll just have to bite the bullet on it.” I’m hoping the fact that this would take place over three years would mean, uh, don’t look at me! [laughs] This is the most equitable way I could think of to allow 250 people the same opportunity at the same 150 books and this is just how it ended up going. I didn’t know how it was gonna go, you didn’t know how it was gonna go, Dagon didn’t know how it was gonna go, Mr eBay didn’t know how it was gonna go, but, son of a gun, this is how it’s going. So, you’ll just have to adjust to that. Corollary to that, and I haven’t even talked to Dagon about this, but Dagon listens to the “Please Hold for Dave Sim”s, so this is a good chance to talk to Dagon about it, we were talking about doing extra stuff with the “High Society: Regency Editions”. [audio repeats from a few minutes ago from “The last time that we talked about it, I think there was 240 people” onward] Things like Iest currency, Iest coins, Diamondback decks, Regency Hotel notepads. I designed a Regency Hotel notepad that would be the notepads that Cerebus and Elrod were doing their bunnies and trees on, which is a very light blue R for Regency watermark in the back of it and a little line at the bottom, “The Regency Hotel, Upper City” in really tiny tiny type, that you wouldn’t be able to see in the comic book, but you can say, oh okay that’s it. And then I would do a [audio missing] and a Cerebus tree on the front of one of these notepads. And what I was thinking was, if we just had this pool of add-ons. Here’s what you can get if you win one of the “High Society: Regency Editions”. You’re not done yet! [laughs] That’s just what the book cost you. Because you got one of them, you now have the option of buying all of this Regency Hotel merch and Iest merch that we will do our level best to make it look like, here’s your bundle of bank notes and it looks exactly like the bank notes in “High Society”, but in real time, taking actual vintage bank notes and rare bank notes and modifying them into Bank of Iest. And whatever we would charge for the bank notes, like here’s a bundle of 50 and you can have that for $10 or whatever, if you want a giant pile of bank notes, all you gotta do is say, “I want a giant pile of bank notes.” or “I want Uncle Scrooge’s money bin full of Iestan coins.” If that really floats your boats, and you’ve got room in your house for that kind of stuff, and you’re willing to pay us to turn a profit on that, whatever you want. You want 16 cartons of Iest notepads? No problem, it’s just a matter of putting the order together. You will get them because you are one of the lucky winners. “Lucky” if you look at how much this is gonna cost you, of one of the “High Society: Numbered Regency Editions”, this was your week. Michael R of Easton, Pennsylvania is gonna be having kittens the week #26 “High Society: Regency Edition” is going up for auction. Michael really really wants it, but presumably when we’re down to #26, so do a whole bunch of other people. I just want to keep it from blowing up in my face, and I want it to make as much money as possible, so there you go. That’s my story and I’m sticking with it.

Matt: It kinda reminds me of the Green Bay Packers, which is the football team in Wisconsin. It’s like hockey in Canada at this point, it’s the state religion in Northeast Wisconsin. And they have season tickets, but when you buy season tickets, you get them for life. You’re the season ticket holder until you decide you’re no longer gonna buy tickets.

Dave: Right.

Matt: And there’s X number of seats in the stadium, so there’s a waiting list. And I believe the last time I heard about it, the waiting list is like a 20 year wait.

Dave: Yep! Yep.

Matt: My Uncle had this idea of a murder mystery where people are randomly dying around the country in sort of similar ways, and it turns out the only thing they have in common is that they’re on the waiting list to get season tickets for the Packers.

Dave: [laughs]

Matt: And the guy that’s 8000 in line is tired of waiting, so he’s bumping everybody off ahead of him.

Dave: [laughs] Okay, I think we can say that everybody that’s planning to bid on the “High Society: Regency Edition” has been warned. [laughs] There might be somebody out there that goes, “don’t get in my way. You wouldn’t like me when I’m angry.”

Matt: When we get down to the last 10, that’s how, it’s gonna be one of those, “what happened to him? Well, somebody pushed him into an elevator shaft and he was wearing a t-shirt with an aardvark on it.” [laughs]

Dave: That’s right. In the library with a candlestick holder. It’s like, ahh man. Okay, we’re getting silly now. See, it’s funny to me, because I’m not gonna be bidding on them. I’m the guy that’s going to be making the money, and Dagon’s going to be making the money.

Matt: And it’s one of those, as much as I’d love a hardcover “High Society” I have a box of five of the 12th printing that I’m like, I’m keeping one and now I have four of them that I figure out what I’m going to do with.

Dave: There you. There you go. “I posted the page in question recently. And I don't think he can do that last one… He also asked (in relation to the hands-through-the-bars Spawn #10 cover): Way back when SPAWN #10 came out, I and (I think) a coupla other guys did a key to all of the caged superheroes, based on the look of their gloves, drawn by Todd. I wonder whether Dave changed any of them for this cover?” And it’s like, Dave’s level of interest in superheroes is way, way, way down on his list of priorities, so I have to say, of the visible hands on the Spawn 10 cover, a bunch of them are just, “okay, what does a superhero’s glove look like?” “It’s got, ya know, a lightning slash on it.” “Okay, put the lightning slash on it.” “Well whose glove is that?” I have no idea. Make it up for yourself. The foreground I stuck with ones that I knew, like Superman, Batman, the Hulk. Todd did Wonder Woman on the two page spread, I think that was the only female superhero of all of the caged heroes, so I thought, well, I can be enough of a feminist to do that. [laughs] I had no problem with putting Wonder Woman in jail. But it turns of the obsession of, these have to be specific superheroes. No, I didn’t do that. I think Sean might have done some of that, so you might ask Sean, looking at Dave’s superhero gloves, were there any that you said, I think this is so and so, I think I’ll do it this way. To me, a superhero’s a superhero. But I do have to say that I did make a point to just do superheroes. And to just do made-up gloves that could be superheroes was just don’t know about. Superheroes that haven’t come out yet, or something like that. Looking at Spawn 10 while I was working on the cover, I noticed it’s got like Doctor Octopus’ arm coming through the bar. [laughs] And I’m going, wait a minute, Dr Octopus isn’t a superhero! You’ve got a villain here. And then I go, he’s got the Joker too! The Joker isn’t a superhero, he’s a villain! This is the complaint that I have with Todd’s generation. No, it’s good versus evil, not good and evil together and we’ll just have to find something new to call it. Let’s call it gevil. So, there you go on that one. Ralph S sent me “For his 'coal entrance' (that he apparently wants to keep but has given up on) Saw the design on Belmont (street) in Kitchener, just now… Four by fours; stout; handy if a baby elephant drops in? (that's what I thought)” Anyway, yeah, I phoned and left Ralph a message letting him know where the Off-White House is, and feel free to just drop by, as often as you need to, looking at the outside and figuring out what needs to be done. I wasn’t clear about the coal entrance, which is what it would have been back in the 19th century when the house was built. That was where the coal was delivered downstairs next to the furnace. I was going to turn that into a separate entrance for going in downstairs, so if Roly is working at Camp David and he needs to get something downstairs, he doesn’t have to knock on the door and I don’t have to go downstairs, he can just let himself in. But I’ve given up on that, it’s like, mmm, no. I don’t want just sort of, make due steps, and I really don’t have the kind of money that you would need to do Off-White House steps out of stone or whatever, so that’s just going to get filled in. We’re going to seal up the entrance completely and just turn it into part of the foundation and then fill in the steps going down and just level it off and plant flowers on it or something like that. So, Ralph, if you want to come by again sometime and look at it from that vantage point and say, okay what’s the easiest, cheapest way to do that? That’s what the Dave Sim administration of Aardvark-Vanaheim is about, is cheap and easy. Hopefully, there’s a sudden outpouring of Cerebus mania that takes place after I’m dead, and millions and millions of dollars come in, and then Eddie can do that kind of stuff. He can excavate where the steps were and put in solid gold steps if he wants. [laughs] That will be a second administration kind of thing. Or if Eddie just has to limp by as I did and then when he kicks the bucket, the third president of Aardvark-Vanaheim experiences Eddie mania, or Cerebus mania, or Dave mania, and billions of billions of dollars come in, then the third president will be able to do that. Fortunately, that will be completely off of my sleeve. I am very very pleased to say, very pleased to contemplate. Gives me a warm feeling inside.

Matt: Okay. [laughs]

Dave: Okay! Uhh, Tony Dunlop, boy, I gotta tell you, this time around with the questions, it’s like, I know the answer to that question, and I know the idiosyncratic Dave Sim answer to that question. Boy is there no way to explain this, but if you ask a question, I’ll do my best to explain it. We might be breaking up this “Please Hold for Dave Sim” into two sessions, if you’re okay with that. Because it’s already 8:14 and I’m just getting to the Amalekites question of Tony Dunlop and going, ohhhh right. And we haven’t even gotten to a couple of the really elaborate questions that I go, I know what I have to say about them. There’s no easy way to say this. “Tony Dunlop askeDave: So, regarding Damian's link” and you wrote, “he’s referring to this comic that Damian T Lloyd posted a link to”. “Don’t idolize yourself, don’t hurt people, blot out the memory of all amalekites, don’t break promises, don’t punish without trial, set aside food for the poor, and destroy all Canaanites and enslave them forever.” And yes, good encapsulation of YHWH lawmaking. But back to Tony Dunlop’s question, “I just happen to be in " Exodus" right now in my daily Scripture reading, and got to the "blot out the memory of the Amalekites" bit...and I couldn't help but wonder… Why, if their memory is to be "blotted out," are they being written about in Israel's sacred history? Maybe Matt can ask Dave what he has to say about that little paradox in next month's "Please Hold?" And yes, but in order to explain the reference to the Amalekites, you have to go back to who the Amalekites are, which goes back to Genesis and the split between Esau and Jacob, that when Jacob supplanted Esau. Esau was the older brother, Jacob was the younger brother. Ordinarily, the Issac’s birthright, which Issac got from Abraham, would have gone to Esau as the older brother. But Jacob fooled, or tempted Esau into selling Jacob his birthright for a mess of pottage, which is where the expression comes from, “you’ve got a mess of pottage for that.” Pottage is stewed vegetables, and this was red pottage. Which resonates with Esau coming out all red and hairy-bodied when he was born. [laughs] This is too many digressions already. Believe me, I’m trying to stay on subject here. Anyway, so Jacob supplanted Esau and took his birthright, and then fooled his father Isaac again and got Esau’s blessing, so the younger brother ended up getting what the older brother was supposed to be getting. And Esau, not taking this very well, realized that his parents, and particularly his mother, hated the Edomites, which was a pagan civilization adjacent to the Israelis, the Hebrew people, the Jews. And decided that he would fuse himself to the Edomites, to the extent that Esau became Edom, and so he went from being the person who would have been the successor to Isaac, and the heritor of the Jewish nation, to the founder of the Edomites. Amalek was the name of his grandson, that he progenited after he became Edom. So, this is one of those, Esau chose to corrupt himself, realive to monotheism, and this is now, Amalek is the second generation of pagan corruption and consequently, everyone in Amalek’s tribe that was born became the Amalekites. Jacob is traveling with his two wives and all of his children, and all of his flocks and herds and everything, and find out that Esau is coming toward him, and is coming toward him with like 400 armed men. Jacob was really something of a coward, so he basically puts all of his flocks and herds in front of him, and a giant chunk of the flocks and herds that he’s going to offer as a bribe to Esau to not kill him and not kill his family, and all of his tribes, he was father of all 12 tribes of Israel, and then put Leah and her children, which was one of his wives but not his favorite wife, in the next rank, and then Rachel, his favorite wife, and Joseph and Benjamin, her sons ahead of them, and then Jacob in the back. And that’s [laughs] you want to talk about leading from behind. Well, Jacob set the tone for that. Anyway, he’s definitely afraid that Esau is coming to kill him, and basically goes toward Esau, driving this giant herd of cattle and sheep and whatnot ahead of him, and bowing himself to the ground as he’s walking toward Esau, which is, ahhh, you don’t want to be doing that. If you’re a monotheist, you don’t want to be bowing to a pagan, and your brother has chosen to be a pagan. Very much to his surprise, Esau just sort of says, “what’s with all these cattle and sheep and everything that I passed on my way over here?” And Jacob says, “to find grace in the sight of my lord Esau”, again, calling him lord is not a particularly good idea. And it’s like Esau sort of goes, “it’s okay my brother, I have enough. What’s yours, you keep yours. I got mine, I’m keeping mine.” It’s like, still not a lot of love lost between these people. Like,” you supplanted me in monotheism. I don’t want a bribe from you. I’m not gonna kill you, but really let’s just leave bad enough alone.” And Jacob is so relieved, okay this is idiosyncratic Dave Sim interpretation of it, is so relieved that Esau isn’t gonna kill him, that he insists, “no, please, take this.” And it’s like, Esau goes, “well, whatever, okay, I got probably as many flocks and herds as you do, but thanks. Okay, now I got some more.” And then they’re traveling for a ways together, and then Esau says, “actually, why don’t I take some of my people and give them to you. Give you some of these Edomites” and Jacob goes along with that. And it’s like, okay again, bad choice. That’s two different thing, accepting a chattel and sheep at auction as a bribe or relief or gift of some kind from your estranged brother, but taking pagans from a pagan tribe and grafting them into your monotheistic context, bad choice. Very bad choice. And in matter of fact, if you look at the subsequent chapters to that, that enacts [inaudible] in very bad ways. Dinah, Jacob’s daughter, ends up, she’s just going to look around the new land that they live in, and gets kidnapped by Shechem and raped by Shechem, and Shechem says to Jacob, “I really like your daughter, so I want to marry her.” And it’s like, you just kidnapped and raped her. And it’s like, well yes, that’s an implication of you allowing Esau to plant Edomites in your monotheistic context. That’s a bad choice, that’s why that happened. Okay, that’s kind of a digression. The other thing that Jacob did was exactly what Tony’s asking about. Why, if their memory is to be blotted out, are they being written about in Israel’s sacred history? That was one of the things that Jacob did and was again, to me, really really stupid, but I can understand why he did it. He was so relieved that Esau wasn’t gonna kill him, that he went, “okay, we’ve got all of these genealogy of so-and-so begat so-and-so, and so-and-so begat so-and-so, and so-and-so begat so-and-so. All the way back to Adam in the Garden of Eden. As my of going, isn’t this great that Esau isn’t going to kill me, let’s incorporate the Edomite genealogy starting with Esau, and you scribe, you sit down with the Edomites and get their genealogy and we’ll include it in the Torah.” And it’s like, mmm, bad idea. Coincidentally, that’s Genesis 36, which is the Edomite genealogy. I have the Torah in Hebrew, and John’s Gospel and Revelation in Aramaic, and the Koran in Arabic, are the only things that I’ve got on iTunes on my laptop, and I have those playing continuously while I’m asleep or while I’m doing things that I don’t have to completely focus on, when I’m back in the residence part of the Off-White House. And coincidentally, Genesis 36, with the Edomite genealogy, is one of the only ones that I recognize when it’s playing as, “oh, it’s Genesis 36”. Most of the time I’m just listening to Hebrew scripture, and unless they’re using a formal name that I know is in a specific chapter, I don’t know what chapter it is. So, the reason that I know it, is because everybody was called a duke in the genealogy, or a bunch of them were called dukes. Duke Teman, Duke Tebah, Duke Zepho, Duke so-and-so, Duke… and that’s like the KGV. Englishmen in 1611 going, “Okay, what is this Jewish term? Or was is this, I think it’s probably an Edomite term of an honorific for the people that are being cited. What’s an equivalent of that? Well in England, that would be a Duke. So that’s what we’ll call them, Dukes.” The Hebrew word is Aluph, so here’s Genesis 36, just a few seconds of it, with the Aluph in sequence… lemme just get it cued up here, where are we? Here we go. [audio plays in Hebrew, “Aluph” said a bunch] Well there ya go. Could you hear that?

Matt: Yeah, yeah. I heard it. That’s a lot of Aluphs!

Dave: I had it all the way cranked up and I was holding it as close to the speakerphone as I could. So, that’s the explanation for that, to me, was bad choices on Jacob’s part, and that’s why the Edomites lasted a lot longer as a pagan society than they would have because they were incorporated as Jacob’s not very bright idea as Genesis 36 and it did take a while, if you just sort of search Amalekite as a term, it definitely lasted almost until the Jewish monarchy. The advent of the Jewish of the monarchy, which is a long time from Genesis, a good 2000, 3000 years. Just a bad idea, don’t do that. Don’t put pagan stuff in the Torah, just put monotheistic stuff. But then, that’s my argument is, you’d have a much better Torah if you just took the YHWH stuff out and then just had what God had to say. God didn’t have too much to say, but all of God’s stuff is good stuff, in my frame of reference. It was interesting because when I looked up aluph, which is actually spelled A-L-L-U-P-H in my Strong’s Concordance, each term has it’s own number, and you look it on by number to find out what it’s origin was. Aluph is term #441, as Eddie Khanna who is listening right now would know, 441 was Alex Raymond’s favorite license number. So there’s about the weirdest comic art metaphysics you could possibly, possibly imagine.

Matt: Right.

Dave: You’re struck speechless!

Matt: Well no, I’m actually making a note about that, okay at 1:26 the SDoAR… I’m gonna make a note when I’m splitting the videos up of, hey, if you’re really into the “Strange Death of Alex Raymond”…

Dave: [laughs]

Matt: Here’s a teaser for Volume Three! [laughs]

Dave: It would certainly make the strangest “Jeopardy” answer that you could possibly imagine. “Remember the answer has to be in the form of a question.” Uhh, “Steve asked (after I posted pictures of you signing some CiH? books): So, I try to be an astute reader, to pay attention, not interrupt when the adults are talking, watch and listen for subtle verbal clues and mannerisms. But for the life of me I have absolutely no recollection of ever hearing what's the deal with all the signed by Dave “Cerebus in Hell?” issues as pictured here and elsewhere: where do they go, who gets them, how.. So please, help a wandering, wondering poor soul out and fill in the gaps in my thinking caps.” [laughs] Well, thank you Steve. That was very nicely phrased, and Roly got a good laugh out of that today, because today “Spider-Whore” came in, so they were all getting laid out so that I could sign them. [laughs] And I said, “ya know I’ve been always reminding you, ‘oh, oh, I’m signing the books. Take a picture, take a picture for A Moment of Cerebus and email it to Matt Dow. Okay, got that done.’” And you’re right, we never explained why I was doing this. The Cerebus Archive copies of the “Cerebus in Hell?” books. As the circulation dropped lower and lower on the “Cerebus in Hell?” books and I was going, okay, I’m gonna have to do something. If these drop below what I was sold on “Cerebus” #1, I mean, 40 years later and I can’t sell what I did when I was 20 years old and a complete rookie. What I thought was, okay, I’m always at cross purposes to most people’s way of thinking, while everybody else is saying these are becoming less and less of interest to anybody, which is why we need fewer and fewer of them, my reaction is au contraire. I think these will be very valuable social commentary at a time when everybody else was just genuflecting to the feminist dictatorship. Only one guy was saying, uhh, no, this is getting really really funny now. So I’m going to do a very humorous comic book about how this ridiculous society I find myself in is conducting itself. And I think these are actually going to be a really hot commodity for that reason. So as the circulation is going lower and lower, I’m gonna order more and more of them for myself, or the Cerebus Archive, so that I’ve pretty much cornered the market compared to everybody else. Everybody else it takes them four months to sell the four copies that they bought and they’re very relieved. “Okay, I never have to even think of that comic book again.” So, yeah, I was getting 30, I think back when Sandeep and I were starting “Cerebus in Hell?” and I went up from there to about 50, now I’m up to 105. It’s like, no, if you really think that year four of “Cerebus in Hell?” is only going to be of interest to 1800 people in perpetuity, however long the Cerebus Archive lasts, uh no, I think I’m gonna bet heavily on myself. At least numerically, there’s fewer copies of this than there are of “Cerebus” #1 and we know what that’s going for in pristine condition. So, apart from this new wrinkle of not signing Doug Sulipa’s books, and signing all of the Cerebus Archive books, I also sign three copies to Eddie the successor. Eddie gets three copies of each “Cerebus in Hell?”, “to Eddie the successor, Dave Sim”. Sandeep Atwell, as the co-creator of “Cerebus in Hell?” Even though he’s not here anymore, he gets five copies of each “Cerebus in Hell?” numbered Atwell #1 out of 5, Atwell #2 out of 5, Atwell #3 out of 5… And hopefully, somewhere down the line, he will be able to say, “okay I’m going to auction all of my #3s, or this particular #1” or whatever. That’ll be up to him, I hope he makes a million dollars, because it’s definitely an invaluable contribution to “Cerebus in Hell?” It wouldn’t be the same book without Sandy Atwell. I also… Kevin Eastman. It wasn’t actually Kevin Eastman, it was his wife Courtney who does his tweets, tweeted about “Cerebus in Hell?” when I sent them a couple, so now they’re on the freebie list. So they always get a signed copy, “to Kevin and Courtney.” Rick Norwood, who still sends me “Comics Revue” for free, even though I have time to read very very little of it, it’s very nice of him to do that, so he gets a copy personalized to Rick Norwood. And that’s the extent of the comp list. Everything else goes into the Cerebus Archive, and anytime I want to surprise somebody or I have to make up something to somebody, as is going to happen with these Halloween Editions to the people who have voted yes to allow artist proofs to be offered for sale. When I send them their numbered Halloween Edition and their artist proof, they’ll probably be also getting some signed “Cerebus in Hell?” #1s. So that’s always handy. Nice surprise for a Cerebus fan, and if you have to make up something to somebody, there’s boxes and boxes of them at this point with 105 each. We’re having a lot of trouble in this age of shortages of longboxes and bags and boards. Roly’s always having to keep them on order with Lookin’ For Heroes and Studiocomix Press. And boy we had a real run there with [laughs] “You Don’t Know Jack” came in, “Cerebus in Hell?” came in, all of the proof copies for “Cerebus” #1 came in, proof copies for the Spawn 10 ashcan. Man oh man, we go through enough bags and boards and boxes as it is! I’m hoping that will calm down a little bit.

Matt: Well, the reason Steve asks is cause I’ve been getting the photos, it’s like, well I dunno what I’m supposed to do with these. So I was kinda just, okay I’ll put them up, and other things came up, and it go to the point where in the rigmarole where I say, “hey, don’t forget to swing by the store and pick up ‘Batvark: Penis’” and I specifically remember “Vault of Cerebus” was one of them where it was, oh yeah, I got those photos of Dave signing them, so I put the photos up, because it was, “speaking of ‘Cerebus in Hell?’, don’t forget to pick up ‘Vault of Cerebus’. Hey there it is now!” and the three photos of you signing them.

Dave: Right.

Matt: I did that for a couple of covers, and that’s when Steve’s going, “okay, why are we doing this?” And it’s because I’m getting stuff from Dave, and it’s a moment I can use it! [laughs]

Dave: Right, right. To me it’s a really cool thing, because I would never in my life have 100 copies of my own of “X-Men” #1 in pristine mint condition. But I did have, and do have, a giant pile of “Cerebus vs LGBTQ Etc.” #1, which looks a hell of a lot like a “X-Men” #1, particularly if your eyesight isn’t as good as it used to be. Same thing with “Fornicators Inc.”, wow, this is just like having 100 mint copies of FF #1! This is so cool! Uh, Damien T Lloyd asks, “How much goo would a guru spew if a guru could spew goo? (Sorry; I think the edibles are kicking in.)” [laughs] It’s… okay, yeah, we got I counted three cannabis stores opening in downtown Kitchener. Theoretically, I dunno. Putting up a storefront is very different from having a functioning store in this day and age, but it’s like, no homey don’t do that anymore. It’s not a matter of “if it’s legal, it’s okay”, you can make cannabis, edibles, and smokeables, and hash oil and everything else, as legal as you want it. It’s still stupid. I deeply appreciate the fact that you’re not allowed to display cigarette packages in stores that sell cigarette packages. You have to have little doors over the top of them, so people can’t see cigarette packages. It’s like, that’s very very good. I have no idea where the Viscount 1s are in there, and I haven't smoked a Viscount 1 since the last century, but homey don’t do that no more. Walked past a couple of neighbors who were smoking a doob when I was going downtown to a get a pizza, and it’s like, the old Dave Sim would’ve gone, “hey there’s a great idea! Let’s take a couple of horks off the doob, and then go and get the pizza.” And it’s like, nope, just, hi folks! They said hi, I kept going, and it was, nope, nope, never again. Never again.

Matt: Or take a couple of hits off of it and then go buy two pizzas! [laughs]

Dave: Right, yeah. Or pizzas and the two bite brownies. Gosh, those Doritos are looking good too.

Matt: It makes me laugh when you said that they’re opening up the cannabis shops cause, it’s gotta be like six or even seven years ago I was visiting my Dad with Paula and Janis, and we’re out and about grocery shopping, doing whatever. I’m driving, and he’s telling me where to go, “okay park here”, and it’s kind of a crap park job, like on the side of a building on the corner of this block. And he’s like, “c’mon, let’s go”, I’m like what’s going on, “just come in” and we go up and it’s, okay go down the steps into the basement, we go in the basement, and it’s a head shop. And I’m like okay, why are we…? And my Dad’s taking care of something and Paula and I are kinda, okay, it’s a head shop. I have my two year old or three year old daughter with me, and she’s walking around looking at stuff, whatever. Well it’s one of them head shops that’s a head shop on the east side, but it’s kind of an adult bookstore on the west side. And she walks up and there’s a bunch of sex toys, that you really can’t tell they’re sex toys, but she sees something and she goes, “balloons!” And I look and I’m like, no, that’s an inflatable thing that’s not a balloon. Let’s walk away from this, kid.

Dave: Ohhh God! Ahh man.

Matt: We get out, and I turn to my Dad, and I’m like, why did we stop there? “Oh, I just thought you might wanna see a head shop.” I’m like, you do realize the three year old’s with me, right?! [laughs]

Dave: Your Dad is a caution, I tell ya.

Matt: He’s a fun guy at parties, but every now and then, I’m like, Dad, you’re forgetting, it’s not you and I having a boy’s weekend, I have the family with us. [laughs]

Dave: Man, oh man. Okay. Alright, well…

Matt: She was young enough that she didn’t know what she saw and she doesn’t remember it, so I’m happy about that part. But it was just afterward I’m like, Dad, next time you wanna go to the head shop, maybe give me a head’s up and we’ll drop the wife and kid off at home, and then we’ll go to the head shop. You can do whatever you need to do, and I’ll be like, “hey, do you have any underground comic books?”

Dave: Really. They used to be in here. Okay, John Christian asked, “Did he ever give a name to the guy that had "Filbert" (Sump-Thing) back in issue #25?? The artist guy that was unafraid of the Woman-Thing??” Uhh, no No, I think… I always called him the Little Artist Guy, or the Guy with the Hair, and I am still convinced that as part of the zeitgeist that is part of comic art metaphysics, I was the one who got to tell people that Alan Moore is on his way.

Matt: [laughs]

Dave: You have no idea what that means right now, but here’s a mini-me version of the guy who is going to completely transform the comic book field. And I think that might be part of the reason why I didn’t give him a name. Whoever gave me the advance look at Alan Moore went, “ahh, no I can’t give you a name to go with that, because that would be just too potent. You’d blow up real good at that point.”

Matt: [laughs]

Dave: And yes, you point out, “There is a great page from that issue coming up for auction soon.” That’s the November 19th to the 22nd Heritage Auction and I just got the catalog in and I thought, yeah if you were gonna get a page and you had the bucks, that would be a really good page to have. Even more amazing is the three pages from 112/113 that they have at the front of the catalog. I think it’s pages 2 through 4 of 112/113. Because it’s a silent issue and there’s no word balloons and no captions, and really going to the moodiness of Cerebus’ isolation, boy if you want probably three of the best Gerhard background pages that have come to market as a package. If you don’t have unlimited funds, or pretty close to unlimited funds, you’re just going to be a spectator along with the rest of us, but if you have a semi-bottomless bank account and no way to go out and spend it because airlines have been made history, nobody can travel anywhere. You’ve just got all of this money piling up in your bank account, I don’t think you were ever find a better Gerhard deal than those three pages. Some nice Cerebuses, too, but by that time doing Cerebus was pretty much a slam dunk for me. Margaret Liss asks, “From tomorrow's notebook entry, a question arose. I looked up Superman”, oh okay, this is the notebook page. Okay, let me flip to my notebook page so that I’m looking at that at the same time. “I looked up Superman ##165, the title of which is ‘Beauty and the Super-Beast’, and for volume one, that was published in November of 1963, so I’m not sure why Dave wrote down 1979 beside it. I had to look up what the Heatwave Festival 1980 was a reference to. And amazingly enough it has its own entry on Wikipedia.” I’m not surprised. It was a very big deal in southern Ontario, “A music festival held in Bowmanville, Ontario – a town on the other side of Toronto from Kitchener, about a 1.5 hour trip (according to Google Maps). Sounds like a question for Matt’s next call to Dave, as I don’t remember Dave ever mentioning it before.” Okay, let’s start with “Superman” #165. You should have gotten an email from Roly of the scan of my copy of “Superman” #165. Did you get that?

Matt: Uh, not yet, but usually those come at about 9 o’clock at night, my time.

Dave: Okay, alright.

Matt: So I’m sure it’ll show up tonight.

Dave: Okay, when you get it, I’ll grab the copy right here. And when you’re posting the “Please Hold for Dave Sim”, you will be able to just post the scan of the cover, and then people can listen to this really really strange story while they’re looking at this, [laughs] and go, “okay, I’m looking at it. This is pretty unbelievable, but it can’t be completely unbelievable, because I’m looking at this.” So yes, “Superman” #165, “Beauty and the Super-Beast” and Carson Grubaugh is gonna love this, because it’s the Circe cover of Superman and Carson’s definitely got a thing about Circe, particularly since he found all of the Circe references in the “Rip Kirby” sequence “Terror on the Thames” and will be doing a whole chunk on that for “Strange Death of Alex Raymond”. As Margaret says, it’s dated November 1963 and we know the significance of November 1963, so this was the first Superman comic book I ever bought, or got bought for me by my Dad at Heck’s Variety Store on Highland Road here in Kitchener, so it would have been late summer of 1963. And the cover is Circe stepping out of her cask that she’s been in, and saying, “You were a fool to think only Kryptonite can effect you, Superman! With my mighty magic, I now turn you into a beast! And the spell will remain until you agree to marry Circe!” [laughs] And it’s like, uh okay, Mort Weisinger was all over the map on this stuff and, okay 1963 was a whole different time period and it was a specific Superman Family time period. So anyway, this copy that’s scanned, this isn’t my original copy. That was gone a long time ago, but I was somewhere in a used bookstore or something like that and they had old comic books and I went, “oh, it’s a ‘Superman’ 165. It’s in really bad condition, but it’s ‘Superman’ #165, which has this amazing sentimental attachment to it for me. So I’ll buy this.” Okay, flash forward to 1979, which is why this is listed in 1979, and why it’s at the top of the list. The list that Margaret is looking at is significant life changing, mind changing (which is how I looked at it at the time, soul changing is how I’d look at it now) events and let’s write them down and the years that they occurred. Let’s write them down in what I would say is the order of significance and then attach a year to it, which is why “Superman” 165 is at the top of the list for life changing. Flash forward to 1979, where Michael Loubert, my brother in law, had give me, I think, four or five hits of acid for my birthday. A bad idea. I was barely okay with buying a hit of acid and just doing that hit. Any drug that I had, I wanted to do it until it was gone. You can’t really do that with acid, but anyway. I had taken a hit of acid and was working on “Cerebus” #11, pages 236 to 241, the first appearance of the Cockroach, and was penciling pages, and the pages were coming out really good. But I wasn’t really registering the fact, well, you don’t do pencil pages, you don’t do multiple penciled pages. The way you do your work is one page at a time so you know, okay I’ve got a page done today. Because this page I haven’t started on and now it’s done. That was the only way that keeping “Cerebus” then bimonthly was going to work. Working on those, and took a break, it’s the middle of the night and I’m flying on this hit of acid, and glommed onto this copy of “Superman” 165 that I had sitting out for some reason. Sort of looking at it, and looking at Superman changing into a lion, and sort of going back and forth between looking at this as an acid experience and remembering what it was like when I was 7 years old and had this comic book bought for me. And reading the dialogue and looking through the book, like reading it and quasi-reading it. You’re also gonna get scans of interior pages where, whoever owned the comic book before I owned the comic book, had written numbers. 6 + 6 = 12. And then the next number after 6 is 7, 12 + 7 is 19. Next number after 19 is 8, adds to 27, next number is 9, adds to 36, next number is 10, adds to 46, and then for some reason, did 10 again. [laughs] And it’s like, being on acid it’s like I was really really focused on this and going, well wait a minute, why are there two 10s? I won’t go anymore elaborate on that, but it was, no it’s definitely in a child’s handwriting, but what is it that the child was doing? What is it that they were seeing, and why were they writing this next to this Superman story over the course of two pages? And then flipped back to the cover and I looked at the cover and I went, oh, this just looked like a blue scribble on the front of the comic book, but I can see now with my sharper focus, my focus is like incredibly intense at this point, and I’m going, oh, it’s actually an M and A in the blue ink. M-A. And I’m going, whoever owned it, wrote the first half of magic M-A, and was anticipating that at some point someone was going to figure this out and write the G-I-C. And I thought, well okay, I’ll do that. And I went, okay, it’s in blue, so it would make sense, let’s do the reciprocal, I’ll grab my magenta magic marker, I had a set of markers in the studio and I will write G-I-C. This thing finally got accomplished after, well it would have been 16 years at that point. And wrote the G and suddenly felt this massive presence take over my body and my mind, and suddenly I had to take this magenta magic marker and mark the line in between the M and the A and following the line of Circe’s magic wand, and I had to cover all of that up with the magenta. And then I did that, and I went, no, what I have to do is cover up the half of the cover, and it has to be the bottom half of the cover, and I have to cover it with my magenta magic marker. Which, as you can see, doesn’t work as well sideways as it does up and down. And got that done and went, okay, I’m gonna have to go with this a lot more carefully in order to cover up the actual image, and it’s not actually covering up the image. The vertical one is, but the horizontal one is. I’m probably going to have to go and buy a new magenta magic marker and this all took place in about the space of 10 minutes. And then I went, what in the heck am I doing?! Where did this come from? And I still have no answer for that, but vividly remember this… I have never been that far removed from my conscious mind and possessed by some other entity that had this definite, definite priority. “This is what needs to be done”, and then “no, that’s not what needs to be done. This needs to be done”, and then I was able to get myself back and go, what am I doing? Why would I do that? It’s, like I say, it was… I just got the G done. It was sort of years later that I went, oh what the heck I’m just gonna take the magic marker and write the IC, and it’s [laughs] at some point I want this accomplished. So I got this accomplished. So there you go, that was the reason that was on this list. Are you okay for time? Like, you gotta get some sleep at sometime, right?

Matt: Oh no no, I’m good for time.

Dave: Okay, as long as you’re good, it’s like…

Matt: As long as you’re good is what, I worry about your clock more than mine.

Dave: [laughs] Okay. I’m actually fine, because with the prayer times migrating backward with the Daylight Saving Time, I’m now done prayers and I actually had something to eat before I phoned you, so this is the magical part of late fall and winter, when you’re observing Muslim prayer times is, man oh man, I’ve got like the whole night to myself.

Matt: [laughs]

Dave: Okay, so the next one after that. “Gene Day, I think we both know that neither of us is going to set the world on fire.” And that was a profound experience for me. A life changing thing because I knew what he saying. You gotta lower your expectations and say, I’m making a living in comics, or I’m making a living in comics and doing some commercial art, whatever it is, don’t think of yourself as a world beater, and don’t be trying to be a world beater. I took, not great offense or great umbrage at this, but was definitely going, no, I haven’t conceded that point, personally. I had no idea you were in that category, but to me, Gene Day was the guy who, he worked that hard, had so many books in the water, because he did think he was gonna set the world on fire at some point, and he was just waiting to see which one that it was. That’s what I learned from him, was do lots of stuff. Don’t sit and wait to see what’s going to happen with this. Do something else, and then do something else right after that, and do something else after that. Try and get as much done in the day, you never know, one of these is going to catch fire. And that, I think, was definitely a seminal moment for where Cerebus came from, was going, I didn’t know this about Gene Day, and I’m astonished to find out Gene Day thinks that way. That he takes it as a given that he’s not gonna set the world on fire. I had no idea that I still considered myself a person who could potentially set the world on fire and that sharpened up that side of me. The part that went, uh no, that’s what I’m watching for. I’m not just going, okay I’ve gotta find somebody else who’ll pay me to draw comics. I gotta find somebody else who’ll pay me to do a drawing of Conan. I gotta find a business in town that will let me do advertising for them. No, I was gonna do all of those, but I was always looking for Cerebus from that moment. So that’s why that one was on this list of incredibly important life changing events. You can see that the “Superman” 165 has a check mark next to it, Gene Day has a check mark next to it. “Deni, hi are you Harry? 1976.” It was, yeah, that was the transformational moment. If she hadn’t come downstairs at Now and Then Books, it’s hard to picture Cerebus happening. The first one was transformative of I have never been in this completely altered state of being even in all of my drug experiences, and I never have since then, had an experience like that. Gene Day, I’ve never had that experience in conversation with somebody. Deni, I had no idea how important that was. It was just, wow, a girl is talking to me! Let’s see how long I can keep this girl talking to me. “Dave Dwyer, 1976” was my gay landlord at 279 Queen Street South, and that was a transformative moment in time because he was obviously thinking that he was going to take this, I will flatter myself, very pretty 20 year old boy with neatly cropped little beard and is going to help him learn that he’s actually gay, and become a gay man. That happened in two stages, going to his Christmas party, when I had first moved out of my parents’ house, and then a week later, discovering him dead in his office. That was transformative in terms of, I have never had the experience of seeing someone transparently trying to transform me into somebody I absolutely wasn’t, and being 100% confident that’s what he was going to do. And then being the first dead person that I ever saw, outside of a funeral home, where somebody came to my door and said, “you know the guy in the office around the side?” I said, yeah, Dave Dwyer. They said, “I think he’s dead.” I was like, dead? No, I was just at his Christmas party last night. I go around the side of the house, and yes, he’s… “Dave?” tried to shake him. When I actually touched him, to try and wake him up, I thought he was just dozing at his desk. When I touched him, I got these two electrical flashes through my wrist, and definitely noticed that as a, okay I’ve never had something happen like that before and I have no idea what that is, and it’s very weird that it happened in this situation. So that’s why that’s #4 on the list. [laughs] “Heatwave Festival, 1980.” That was Sally, who was my mistress when I got married, was getting married herself. Deni was invited to the wedding, but obviously I wasn’t. Like, you don’t want your new wife’s former lover at your wedding. It’s just one of those things that… and that was part of the transformative nature of that, was, okay, I had no idea that these sort of things exist in life. No, I would have been comfortable going to the wedding, but I’m pretty sure Sally wouldn’t have been comfortable, and I’m pretty sure Bill, who she married, wouldn’t have been comfortable. So, okay, I’m not going to the wedding. And Bob said, “there’s going to be a music festival, it’s called the Heatwave Festival, it’s got all these bands and stuff like that, and it’s the same day. Why don’t we just make it that Deni and Karen go to the wedding, and you and I go to the Heatwave Festival?” I thought, okay, I’ve never been to a big outdoor Woodstock-style festival. Why not? It’d give me something to do. And then Karen, she and Bob were married at that point, I’m pretty sure, went, “well, if you’re going to the Heatwave Festival, I want to go to the Heatwave Festival instead of the wedding.” And it’s like, uhh, you’re Sally’s best friend. Sally was the maid of honor at your wedding. And I’m sitting there going, this is really my fault. This is spinning badly out of control, and it’s like, yes, this is what fornication as entertainment and adultery gets you, is these really really bad complications, so, as it turns out, Bob, and Karen, and I went to the Heatwave Festival and Deni went to Sally’s wedding…

Matt: So, trying not to ruin the wedding by showing up, you ruined the wedding by taking somebody else. [laughs] At that point in your life, were you living “Three’s Company”?

Dave: Uh, you definitely understand it better. It’s one of those, it’s much more entertaining watching a movie and on television than actually trying to live through it.

Matt: Yeah.

Dave: When you’re going, well, okay, what are the rules here? And it’s like, there are no rules. That’s what you’re not understanding, kid. That’s what turning your back on God gets you, is going, “I need some rules here. I need some guidelines.” No, you’re already well over into Bob Dylan, “you have to be honest if you live outside the law” territory and it’s like, newsflash, you can’t be honest if you live outside the law. And that’s one of the reasons that the Heatwave Festival is on there, is going, that experience of going, “this is my fault, and this is getting worse and this is going to have a permanent effect on four people’s lives, and that’s a really bad thing. This is very very bad karma.” So that was transformative, in terms of I have become something that I can’t control, and it’s having negative effects. And having to study that as scrupulously as possible for years until I went, oh okay, it’s just good and evil. There are good things that you can do, and there are evil things that you can do. The Ten Commandments are a very good shopping list for good, and it says, “do not commit adultery”. And the reason it says “do not commit adultery” is because bad things happen when you do bad things, which is like, duh! [laugh] But, if you’ve been raised in this completely libertarian, sybaritic kind of household, relatively speaking, relative to a religious household, that’s the things that is going to happen to you. So that’s why that one is on the list, but at that point I’m not having check marks next to them. It’s really a shopping list of, okay, if I’m gonna talk about myself and I’m gonna do autobiographical, these might be a little too potent. This is like trying to use an atomic bomb to clear tree stumps off your land.

Matt: [laughs]

Dave: [laughs] But let’s write these down, so that I do have a shopping list for Dave Sim’s autobiography. What made Dave Sim into Dave Sim? What were the transformational moments? Then I’ve got the John Lennon quote, “Elvis died when he went in the Army.” And Victor Davis’ reply to that, “John Lennon died when he met Yoko Ono.” And I would still [gap in recording] To the same extent that John Lennon looked very vulgar and very insensitive and not deferential and all of those bad things, saying when he was told Elvis had died, “Elvis died when he went in the Army”, that’s the same situation that Victor Davis and Dave Sim were in saying when John Lennon died, “John Lennon died when he met Yoko Ono.” Another transformative thing of, you can transform yourself and transform general reality by just being the only person to say what you think is the best actual assessment of a situation that puts you at odds with everybody else. So that was a transformational moment. Next one, ahh, “Pedophilia”. Okay. And I wrote “1969, 1970, 1971”. Now that was two incidents, and I’m not sure what year it was, it was those are the three years that it possibly could be, 1969, 1970, and 1971, where Steven Dick, who was… [laughs] boy, you want to talk about a comic art metaphysics resonance name. Steven Dick, who was my closest friend and about my only friend 1969, 1970, 71, and his middle name was Ernest. Steven Ernest Dick. [laughs] You couldn’t make that up. He was four days older than me, May 13th, 1956. And we were both babysitters, and that was a new situation. That was something that happened at the same time feminism was starting to happen. Girls were babysitters, boys were not babysitters. My sister and I had only had female babysitters. You wouldn’t think… girls looked after babies and small children because one day they would be a mother and this is a good way for them to learn. Boys and fathers aren’t in that category, so, no, they’ll do something else. Anyway, as I say, we were both babysitters, and one time when we were walking up to Forest Heights Collegiate for school and Steven said, “I was babysitting on Saturday.” Neighbors of theirs on Shadywood Crescent. And it was two girls, and the one girl just all of a sudden says to him, “My father has a big penis. How big is your penis?” [laughs] And it’s like, Steven looked at me like, and it was like his jaw dropped open even remembering it and saying it to me. And it was a weird friendship that we had, because Steven was from a very strict religious family. Strict Baptist. And I was, of course, a complete atheist, so we never had a shortage of things to talk about. But this question being posed to him had obviously flummoxed him and I don’t even remember where the conversation went from there. I think he just changed the subject, and, “okay, let’s not talk about that”, but me being an atheist and coming from a far more sybaritic kind of family, certainly relative to Steve’s family, by 1969, it’s like my father wasn’t hiding his “Playboy” magazines. If you had a “Playboy” magazine, you had a “Playboy” magazine. “The boy wants to look at ‘Playboy’ magazine, that’s up to him.” Which now I don’t agree with, no, 13 year old shouldn’t be deciding, “yeah, I want to look at ‘Playboy’ magazine and actually I want to spend a lot more time in the washroom than I used to”.

Matt: [laughs]

Dave: So, looking at that, I went, okay, I think there’s kind of a legal obligation on Steve’s part, and was I going, is this a father molesting his daughters and he needs to be reported? Because, even at the age of 13, like I say, coming from this sybaritic ultra-liberal kind of environment, I knew that one of the signs of incest molestation is too much of an interest and too much of a focus on things having to do with sexuality and genitalia, way under the child’s experiment. So it’s like, part of me’s thinking, and it’s like I don’t know if I want to have this conversation with Steve because obviously he decided let’s just change the subject and that’s what we’re going to do here. But I was thinking, if he even said to the little girl, “when you saw your father’s penis was it hanging down or was it sticking straight up?” and it’s like I’m going, okay what’s the legal culpability there? But at the same time, that would certainly tell you, okay this isn’t just a peculiar curiosity on the part of this little girl, this child is being abused by her father and I have to report that, and I’m only 13 years old, now the next question was, who does he report that to? Do you go and tell your parents? Do you tell the father and mother when they get home, wherever they are, “your daughter asked me this”? How dicey does that situation get in terms of, “I don’t want you having conversations with my daughter about that”, “well believe me, I didn’t initiate the conversation”, and then I’m going, yeah, in order to have that “I didn’t initiate the conversation” you can’t continue the conversation. So that’s on the list because this was the first time that I looked at transformational situations where, okay, you don’t know what that is, but it could be any number of completely nondescript things, or something really really evil and if it’s really really evil you’re kind of obligated to do something about it. I wouldn’t have thought of it as evil, I would have thought of it as illegal. Somebody, when that’s happening, should be reported. And then shortly thereafter, which is again why it’s 1969, 70, 71, I don’t know which one it was, Craig Dawson, who was a classmate of mine, I don’t have my high school yearbook, so someday maybe a Cerebus fan completeist can get 1969 to 1972 Forest Heights Collegiate yearbooks and will be able to establish, okay, when was I in a class with Steven Dick and with Craig Dawson? And Craig Dawson was talking about having had sex, and having had sex with what was pretty clearly a woman and not a fellow classmate, but a woman. And me, again, the 13 year old who had read Hugh Hefner’s “Playboy Philosophy” and a good chunk of “Playboy” magazine, talking about all of this stuff, going, well okay, that’s illegal. Or is that illegal? This was early enough where molestation was just something that happened with little girls, as far as we knew. I mean we didn’t have any clear grasp of the fact that this is, there’s homosexual pedophiles and there’s heterosexual pedophiles, with all of the implications of that. So, and this happened hard on the heels of Steve telling me about his experience, and me essentially washing my hands of it, going, well, okay, he changed the subject, he’s a nice Baptist kid. Just stay completely away from this, it’s none of my business. That wasn’t the situation with Craig Dawson, cause I’m going, well what is the situation with that? Can an older woman have sex with a 13 year old boy, legally? And it’s like, my reaction was, like I hope so!

Matt: [laughs]

Dave: You know, this was a couple of years after “The Graduate” had come out, and all of us 13 year old boys were looking around for our Mrs Robinson. How many of these are there and how do you get one that just says “uhh yeah, okay, I’ll be your sex toy”? And it’s like, no, we know now, no, that’s molestation and child abuse on both sides. That’s why it’s called statutory rape. A child can’t give consent, so consequently it’s rape, because rape is sex without consent. That’s getting lost, and this is what I was wrestling with. The thing that we’re still ignoring as a society, where we’re talking about child’s rights. “Children are people too. Well, if children are people too, then you’re gonna have to revisit statutory rape. If a child wants to have sex, that’s up to the child.” And it’s like, mmm, no I don’t think you want to go there as a society, and the whole LGBTQ thing doesn’t help with, ya know, Lady Gaga’s “Born This Way”, it’s like, no, if you take “Born This Way” and child’s rights, and put those two together with sexuality, that’s a real devil’s brew mixture. You don’t want to go anywhere near that. So those two things happening that close together when I was 13, 14, or 15, and I don’t know which it was. Grade 9, grade 10, and grade 11. The first time through grade 11. That was seriously transformational. Uhh, “CosmiCon 1972” was transformational in that that was the first time that comic books were alive. Like, apart from going to Captain George Henderson’s Memory Lane in Toronto, and it’s a store full of comic books and there’s a guy that runs the store who knows about comic books. When I talk to him about Detective 27, he knows what I’m talking about. That was transformative, and should probably be on the list. CosmiCon with dealers and that’s actually Neal Adams. That’s actually Joe Kubert. That’s actually Jim Steranko. They’re just walking through the dealer’s room, and I can walk up to this guy that I know is Jim Steranko and say, “hello, Mr Steranko, can I ask you a question?” and he says, “Sure, what?” It’s like, this is unbelievable, because comic books were always like this shining city on a hill over here, and I had this horrible horrible life over here. Suddenly, it was, talk about crossing over. I crossed over into those both exist in the same place. They both exist on the same planet. You can get them together as a fan, but what you want to do is get them together as a professional. And that was definitely transformational in terms of, I had never realized that that was possible. I had never realized, yes, the world is changing itself in such a way that York University, Winters College for three days in March 1972 is going to be like this meeting place of the world. Just completely mind-boggling. “Marijuana. 1976”, was the first time that I had smoked marijuana, but I had never inhaled, just like Bill Clinton. You have to know how to get the stuff into your lungs in order to get high, and I smoked, but I only smoked drawing it into my mouth and then exhaling it. And you’re not getting high that way. So, that was transformational because it was really really good pot, and that was the first time that I had, actually one of the rare times that I had an actual voice in my head that… I was walking around the neighborhood. I used to go for long walks in Forest Hill, just as a matter of habit at night, and I was high and going through all of these time lapse things and everything, and I suddenly, walking down Queens Boulevard, I got this voice in my head saying, “you have all of the pieces, you just have to put them together.” And it’s like, [laughs] okay, I don’t know who that was, it didn’t sound like me, but it was definitely inside my head and it was definitely in a tone of, “you have to listen to this and you have to remember this. This is important. You have all of the pieces, you just have to put them together.” “Sally”, okay, this was before Sally and I started having an affair, which went from July 1978 to January 1979. I was over at Deni’s parents place, Deni’s parents were away somewhere and [laughs] like all good lapsed Catholic children, as soon as the parents were gone, time to have party. So everybody was over having a party and drinking Baby Duck wine and all those kinds of things, playing music too loud, and having all the lights turned way down. And I was sitting in Deni’s dad’s armchair, drinking whatever I was drinking, and there was two candles on the floor of the living room. And Sally came over and sprawled down in front of the candle, and was taking the tips of her hair, she had reasonably long hair, and getting them close to the candle, so that they sort of ignited, and sort of didn’t ignite, and trying to figure out where that spot was. And I said to her, “if you play with fire, you can get burned.” And she said, “I don’t mind.” And at that point, we both knew what we were gonna do. And it’s like, that was transformative in retrospect of going, okay, anytime that that happens where I’m not saying what I’m saying, and she wasn’t saying what she was saying, and you go, uhh, that’s not the way that conversation should have gone. I shouldn’t have said what I said, because then she wouldn’t have said what she wouldn’t have said, and we wouldn’t have both been inside something. Anytime that happens to you in your life, run away from whatever the situation is. “Gananoque, January 1976”, January, February. That was me going up and staying with Gene and Gail, that was my first time living in a comic book environment, because Gene Day was the same kind of comic book nut that I was, and he had two drawing boards, and instead of being at my parents’ place, which was I’m the only weird person who is interested in comics this obsessively, and everybody else in my family, everybody else that I knew looked down on it. Here is the next step after the CosmiCon experience, the same transformational quality of… this is what it would be like to get up in the morning and live comic books all day, and go to bed at night, and then get up in the morning, and live comic books all day. Do other stuff, like visit with Gail’s family, with Gene’s family, go out up street to a movie or watch something on television or whatever. But mostly, this would be your life, where all you do is comic books. And that is definitely what I wanted, and as soon as I got, I’ve never let go of it!

Matt: [laughs]

Dave: That’s what my life consists of. I get up in the morning, and everything that I do is oriented towards comic books, with minor intermittent excepts, and then I go to bed, and I know the moment I get up the next day, it’s gonna be all comic books. Okay, I skipped one of those, “Christmas present cardboard file boxes” we’re going to leave that for next time. We left David Birdsong for next time, so we’ll leave that one for next time. That’s an interesting, and especially complicated story. But I’ll be happy to tell it, and why that was transformational. So, thank you Margaret for finding that page. There’s very few pages in the notebooks that I remember consciously and that was a page where I went, you know if I ever did write my biography, not just I will do a fictional proxy as I did in “Reads” and let’s put this stuff in order. That would be a very good list to go back to, because that would tell me exactly, not only what those seminal events were, but where they were in the pecking order in my mind back in the atheist days. [laughs] And then I started thinking, does that even exist, or am I just picking that I did that? No, I’m pretty sure that I did that because I remember some of the stuff that’s on the list, but not all of the stuff that’s on the list. Okay, where are we now? We are at 9:43, so that’s as long as anybody should have to hold for Dave Sim! We gotta let go for Dave Sim, now.

Matt: We got one more thing we gotta talk about real quick.

Dave: Sure, no problem.

Matt: Which is “Hermann”.

Dave: “Hermann”? Okay.

Matt: “Hermann” is sent to Marquis, it’s at the printers, there’s no way we can change the book, correct?

Dave: Uhh… keep going with that.

Matt: Ben Hobbs sent out the final proof and we all went through it one last time, he’s like, “okay, it’s going in tonight because they wanted it that day” and that was like two days ago, I think?

Dave: Right.

Matt: Okay, now that we can’t change the book, I can tell you, why this is probably my favoritest issue of “Cerebus in Hell?” ever. [laughs]

Dave: [laughs] Okay, there’s a teaser! We should actually do, “okay, and we’ll tell you next month on ‘Please’”… but no, I wanna know. I wanna know. I wanna know!

Matt: Okay, so, it’s in the preview, so this isn’t a spoiler yet, but there’s the secret history of the Bronze-Age Hermann, Mr. H.”

Dave: Right.

Matt: And we teased this, so anybody listening right now will be like, okay. Where the spoiler comes in, so if you want to stop now if you don’t want it spoiled, and you wanna wait till next month, now’s the time to stop. Ya know, goodnight everybody. But for everybody that wants to brave through, Dave mashed all of our names together for the secret history, because it’s kind of a twisted history, I’m not gonna explain why. But the point is, is that Mr H was created by Manly Matt Birdsong and Bashful Benjamin Dow. And that is my favoritest line ever, because I have a sibling. I have an older brother. His name is Benjamin!

Dave: No way.

Matt: And from now on, his name is “Bashful” Benjamin! [laughs]

Dave: [laughs] I actually showed him the first proof which still had a few things that to get added to it, like the apostrophe on “Bashful Benjamin Dow” and it’s Bashful Benjamin Dow with an S because an apostrophe was missing. And we fixed that. But I showed it to him, and I’m like, from now on, you’re Bashful. And then he just glared at me, and then he laughed. And then I explained to him, for Christmas, I’m getting matching long-sleeve black t-shirts, and across the chest of mine is going to say “Manly” in white, and across his it’s gonna say “Bashful” and we’re gonna be the best Batman 1966 goons ever! [laughs]

Dave: [laughs] Well, I will make a grandpa mental note to sign a copy of “Hermann” to Bashful Benjamin Dow.

Matt: When Eddie asked how many copies do you want, I’m like, I’m getting five extra cause if I work on the book, I will sign five and send them up to Dave so that’s three for the archive and two that Dave can get rid of if he needs to. And then I’m like, I need another extra five but I can’t tell you guys why yet, because I’m gonna have my brother sign five of them. [laughs]

Dave: Oh, great! Oh that’s terrific. [laughs]

Matt: I mean, it’s one of those, I read it the first time and I’m like, oh my God, this is great, but I gotta sit on it, I can’t let anyone on the team know cause it’s the whole Tony Twist thing of, “oh, what happens if he gets upset?” It’s like, I don’t care, he’s my brother. He’s either gonna live with it, or he’s gonna live with it.

Dave: That’s right. That’s right. It’ll be interesting to find out if Benjamin Hobbs has an older brother named Matt.

Matt: [laughs] Or if Birdsong has an older brother named Matt, so that it’ll be Manly Matt Birdsong.

Dave: Yes. Anyway, they were the classic Silver Age team on Mr H. Or the classic bronze-age team on Mr H.

Matt: Right.

Dave: So, yes, looking forward to that coming out. It was disappointing sales, we got sales of 1800 on that one.

Matt: I don’t understand why… that was the first time we went, we’re gonna parody something that we don’t know what it is, because we’re hitting it when the iron’s hot!

Dave: Yes, yes. And it was one of those things that we all labored on very very hard and when I read the proof, I actually laughed out loud several times, and I went, “when this isn’t actually hard work, it’s actually pretty darn funny.” So, congratulations. Go ahead.

Matt: I will admit that the page that I wrote is a ripoff of a web comic that I wrote almost 20 years ago. My buddy and I had a bunch of action figures and started taking pictures of them and putting them in backgrounds and we… originally, we didn’t have a camera, we were scanning the toys and then Photoshopping them into backgrounds.

Dave: Right.

Matt: And after about the eight or ninth day where we went, “oh well this is funny, let’s keep doing this”, we went to Walmart and spent $100 on a camera. He spent it, and then he told his parents, cause he was in college, “I need this for work.” [laughs]

Dave: Right. In quotation marks.

Matt: The original strip it’s, Captain Kirk on the desert planet doing the, “a fortune of precious stones and I’d give it all up for a simple spear” or something when he was fighting Gorn, and in the last panel, it’s pulled back, and it’s the background, a sign saying, “you can reenact Kirk” And somebody saying, “Hey TJ Hooker, move aside.” When I got to, we’re gonna do “Hermann”, I’m like, okay, we have to make fun of the whole Hermann’s journal and the actual Rorschach’s journal about, ya know, the city’s full of filth type thing and I’m like, this joke, I’m stealing from myself so it’s okay, I can’t sue myself, right?

Dave: Uhh, I don’t know. If anybody could, I think you could.

Matt: It’s kinda like the time John Fogerty got sued by his brothers because one of his songs sounded like a Creedence song that he wrote and he had to go to court with a guitar and play both songs to show the jury the difference, and he won the class, but the fact was he was accused of plagiarizing himself, and I’m going, only in this world.

Dave: [laughs] This is what we need the courts for, is ridiculous things like that. You wouldn't have that happen outside of a court of law.

Matt: Well, and that’s… now it’s time for everybody to go home. [laughs]

Dave: Okay, I’m gonna go. Say hi to Paula and Janis and Natasha for me.

Matt: Will do. And we will do this again next month, picking up with the Christmas box.

Dave: Sounds good. We’ll see ya then, Matt.

Matt: Yep. Talk to ya then, Dave!

Dave: Buh-bye.

Matt: Bye.

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Okay, We'll do this again every week until I get the next five years of these things posted...

Rigamarole:
Acquaintance to the blog Travis sent in:
My Kickstarter was unsuccessful. Thank you for adding it to the blog in the last several days.
I appreciate it.
I decided to just put the comic for sale on Lulu.
https://www.lulu.com/shop/fanny-kelly-and-hal-kolbeck/my-captivity/paperback/product-459wr8z.html?page=1&pageSize=4
And Tim Gagne sent in:
If you can link this on AMOC Matt Allsion could use the help. https://crowdfundr.com/a2Yvxb?ref=ab_3UXdKBiCFCH3UXdKBiCFCH Bargain @ $10.

I'm selling bootleg Cerebus trading cards featuring my art, coloring by Hobbs, and unused art of MY characters by Dave. $10 a set for 11 cards plus TWO HANDDRAWN cards (by me). Email momentofcerebus@gmail.com and I'll explain how to pay.


The Help Out Bill Messner-Loebs Go Fund Me, or buy Rodney Schroeter's book with proceeds going to Bill. More on this as I'm allowed to post stuff...

Our very own Jen DiGiacomo is part of a film production titled The Day Elvis Died. She'll never ask anybody here, but they're crowdfunding to finish the post production on the movie. (It's set in 1977, will a certain obscure Canadian cartoon aardvark make a cameo? (No. Elvis died in August. Cerebus wasn't published until December. Any appearance in the flick would be an anachronism that would ruin the movie for everybody. EVERYBODY!).) Here's the first trailer.

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Up to 35% off June 23.*
*Sale dates are not final and therefore subject to change.
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You can get all 16 volumes of Cerebus, many of them Remastered for $99CANADIAN at CerebusDownloads.com (More if you want the Remastered Cerebus Guide to Self-Publishing...)
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Heritage has:
  • THREE pages of original art 
  1. Cerebus #3 page 21
  2. Cerebus #20 page 21
  3. Cerebus #293 page 7
  • And Cerebus 1, 3, and 4 slapped.
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Oliver' Simonsen's Cerebus movie: The Absurd, Surreal, Metaphysical, and Fractured Destiny of Cerebus the Aardvark it's currently available on "Plex", "Xumo", "Vimeo On Demand", "Tubi". If you're in Brazil..."Mometu", "Nuclear Home Video".
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Next Time: Jen. SDOAR.

1 comment:

JLH said...

Thank you, Matt. For anyone who finds my initial verbatim style of transcribing grating (like the late Jeff Seiler did, which shows how long it's been since I started on it), I do get better, I promise!