Monday, 12 October 2015

Dave Sim's Dating Advice For Men

Images Of Omaha #2 (Kitchen Sink Press, 1992)
Art by Dave Sim & Gerhard
DAVE SIM:
(from Aardvark Comment, Cerebus #181, April 1994)
New rule the chicks instituted a few years ago without telling anyone, guys. If they say 'yes' and then don't show up (get this) they didn't want to hurt your feelings. No shit. And these people are still allowed to vote. The idea is that if they say 'yes' in person or over the phone, then they don't have to see the look on your face when they say 'no'. When they don't show up or are unavailable for a return call, then you are supposed to get the message. Always (ALWAYS) have something else planned for the night of a date: a movie you want to see, a hockey game on TV, something. Take along a newspaper to wherever you arranged to meet them. Give them fifteen minutes. If they don't show, split and enjoy your plan B. Do not phone them. Do not seek them out. The next time you see them, do not look at them as if they just shot your dog. If they ask you where you were, tell them you forgot (casually, not with an air of astonishment as if aliens just landed in front of you). Do not ask them out somewhere else. They were late. They were wrong. If they ask about the two of you doing something else, ask what they have in mind. If it is the two of you, go along with it. Great -- I'll see you there at... whatever time. If they mention a bunch of their friends are going too... then ditch. They want you in their fan club. Move on to the next chick and forget that one... completely.

Every guy makes up his own mind about the time you spend waiting to see if she shows. Fifteen minutes is my maximum. Anything past thirty minutes and you are a putz, pure and simple.

12 comments:

Sandeep Atwal said...

Can't believe the MRAs and MGTOWs aren't bigger Sim fans. He wrote the manual for them years ago...

Ethan Burns said...

I doubt many of them even know who he is.

Sandeep Atwal said...

That would be my guess....people in comics barely know who he is!

iestyn said...

Would he want the MRA's to be his fans?

Jim Sheridan said...

Can we get Terry Kath' s Guide To Gun Cleaning next?

Tony Dunlop said...

What's an MRA?

iestyn said...

Men's Rights Activists

Laurent Urfer said...

I read this **back then** when it 1st appeared in Cerebus : I thought Sim was a bit harsh.
As I went on with my ahem... adult life I discovered Sim was 100% right especially the "fan club" bit.

Guys don't fool yourself : don't let yourself be put in the "fan club" category with the hopes that someday you'll be moved to the "in bed with" category. It'll never work.
Once in the fanclub always in the fanclub.

Just move on to another girl ;-)

Jeff Seiler said...

The only thing worse than a woman who builds herself a fan club is a woman who's a collector.

D Parker said...

Hey, this was in response to my letter! And hoo boy, I was I a putz. I waited for an hour. Redemption came in the form of a letter from my girlfriend (now wife) in #191.

Andrew Smith said...

Clear and straight forward instructions. But it is not so simple for shy guys all over the web. Moreover, pretending you are cool with her company and not giving her much attention may not work for you every time.

One should be confident enough to ask her out or simply starting conversation by hi. Yes, things can be built between both of you by a simple hi.

Ramesh said...

My way of dating a girl is little different, you can find it in this youtube video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2w3y9S9JS9U